Adventures of a lead dog

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Demon Flash Bandit, Collector, "Connossewer", and Owner of- Closet

October 11th 2013 9:27 am
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I want to thank dogster for choosing my diary entry as a diary pick for the third day in a roll. I hope the humans at dogster have a good weekend!

I do appreciate all the comments supporting my collection that I am keeping on the floor of Mommy's closet. Dogs know that if we keep something, it is a collection, but the humans think we are hoarding, and tend to get all upset about it. Just the other day, I was chatting with my pal (and dog), Chester. Chester has a massive collection of dog poop which he has amassed over the past decade. Another dog named Jasmine, wants one of his valuable pieces to decorate the new dog house her humans are buying for her. Although it is very valuable, he is wiling to part with it for 20 dingo bones. What is my point? My point is that you never know when someone will want something from my collection who will be willing to pay a lot of bones for it. Besides, my human was cleaning the house last week, and she thought I didn't see her, but she threw away a trash bag full of my old toys. This is why I have her toy and Jeff's toy in my stash! If you mess with my stuff, I take your stuff! Another thing....it is not funny when I leave the closet and the humans say, "Demon is out of the closet". I don't know why they get so tickled over that line, but I don't like it and I don't think it is funny at all!

On a more serious note, the humans are working on a new sensor that a dog can wear if they have elderly owners to help keep check on the elderly human's general health! Here is the link:
http://www.gizmag.com/dog-sensor-elderly-care/29327/




Demon Flash Bandit (Collector)

 

Confessions of a Hoarder

October 10th 2013 10:15 am
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Mommy cleaned out one of the closets in her bedroom, and there was absolutely nothing on the floor of the closet. I'm talking nothing whatsoever-not shoes but just totally empty space devoid of stuff. Thus, I claimed the closet for myself. I've been crawling in and out of the closet because I like the feeling of solitude. Mommy has also left the door open so I can get into my "spot". I have to admit that Mommy has noticed that the floor of the closet has stuff on it now. I had a new, still in package Barbie doll, General Zod from the Superman movies (the action figure--not the actual Kryptonian), and now one of Mommy's new shoes is gracing the closet with its presence. I hope the humans don't call that Hoarders show to get me to get rid of my stuff. I like stuff, and I plan to keep it with me. If any of those annoying anti-hoarder television people show up here, I might just have to show them my teeth. I think the dogs reading this know what I mean. I guess it might increase the ratings of the show so I better not advertise that is what I would do!

Demon Flash Bandit (Hoarding Dog)

 

Doggy Elevator!

October 9th 2013 4:18 pm
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I would like to thank dogster for choosing my diary entry a second day in a row as a diary pick. I would also like to thank all the dogs who left such thoughtful and kind comments for me. I also want to conpawtulate my pal, Mr. Jack Sir Freckles-Licks-A-Lot for also being chosen as a diary pick today!!!

As I have gotten older, I don't get on the human bed as much as I used to. Mommy isn't sure if it is because Angel is usually on the bed and I'm letting her have her space or if, in getting older, maybe it is harder for me to get onto the bed. When she bought the new mattress and box springs, the bed got even higher. Even Angel was having some problems getting up onto it so Mommy started looking for some stairs. So far, she hasn't found any she likes, and the mattress has sunk a bit so Angel isn't having any problems getting onto the bed so Mommy might not buy the stairs. However, I told her if it is for me, skip the stairs and get me an elevator. This dog likes to be "in style", and what could be more stylish than riding up onto the bed in my own elevator? For those of you who think it is a dumb idea, here is a link to show you one built by a human whose dog needed it. What do I have to say about that human---Good Human!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJiDrRmp0iI

De mon Flash Bandit (I'll Ride in an Elevator)

 

Chicken or Hamburgers-Which is Best?

October 8th 2013 8:31 am
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I would like to thank Dogster for choosing my diary as a diary pick today. I also want to thank Hershey and Van Winkle for the blue ribbon on my page. Hershey and Van Winkle are hoping that my diary can persuade dogster to return steaks to the gift shop which, if you ask me, is a great idea. Sure, I like frisbees, but I would rather have a steak--and I think I speak for the average dog on that topic!

Now it is time for me to share a "fairy tale" which, surprisingly, has nothing to do with actual "tails".

Once upon a time, there lived 2 dogs in the same house. One of the dogs preferred hamburgers and the other dog preferred chicken. Then one day, the dog who preferred hamburgers got a bite of chicken and decided it was delicious! From then on, that dog expected to get chicken everyday! For those dogs who say they don't get to eat meat the humans eat, my suggestion is to do what Angel Zoom Smokey and myself do: ask for it in human English (or whatever language the humans are speaking). I guarantee you will get what you ask for if you ask for it in human!!!

Yes, that dog who now likes chicken just might be me. Aren't stories better when they are true?


Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Now Likes Chicken)

 

Pass the Chicken, Thank You

October 6th 2013 8:34 am
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I would like to thank my pals, Hershey and Van Winkle for the blue ribbon on my page. It is always wonderful to receive a gift from my pals!

I have a quick link to share with my pals about a new virus affecting dogs in Michigan. It doesn't seem to be causing a lot of problems at the moment, but I want your humans to be aware of it.

http://detroit.cbslocal.com/2013/10/04/2-cases-of-new-do g-virus-confirmed-in-michigan/

Now onto a more important topic. Angel Zoom Smokey is a big fan of chicken. Angel would eat chicken and I would eat hamburgers for dinner everyday. However, I have decided that her chicken is delicious, and we have both been eating the same thing. I discovered that Angel is right--chicken is delicious! It is a shame I took so long to come up with the observation.

Demon Flash Bandit (Chicken is Good!)

 

Author of Featured Diary!

October 5th 2013 9:24 am
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I would like to thank dogster for choosing my diary as one of the diary picks of the day. Whenever I am chosen, I know that dogster is making a wise decision. I also want to mention that my modesty is one of my more endearing traits!

I have some exciting news for sled dogs which I should have reported earlier, but I wasn't aware of it until today. The "event" is the Northern New England Sled Dog Trade Fair which is being held today and tomorrow at the Hopkinton Fairgrounds in Contoocook, New Hampshire. This event holds a special interest for sled dogs like myself. However, I will not be attending largely because New Hampshire is a long way from here. Besides, since those dogs aren't mushing to a drive-thru window at a restaurant, what is the point of me going there anyway? It is for sled dogs who mush where their humans want them to mush. If you ask me, a dog should not have to listen to the stupid humans. By the way, am I the only dog who thinks that the HOPkinton Fairground should be hosting bunny events? I am sharing the link for those who might live around that area who want to attend.

http://www.fosters.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID= /20131003/GJENTERTAINMENT_01/131009919/-1/FOSENTERTAINMENT

Demon Flash Bandit (Featured Diary Author)

 

Preserved Birds

October 4th 2013 8:16 am
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There is a lake in Tanzania that is lethal to birds. There is something in the water that not only kills the bird, but also preserves him so that you can enjoy the sight of a dead bird for years to come. A team of distinguished doggy scientists has been dispatched to study this lake so we can learn how to make more of them. Of course, the scientists are being extra careful. If the water can kill and preserve a bird, it might possibly do the same thing to dogs. Here is the link so that you can read more about the lake:

http://www.abovetopsecret.com/forum/thread974133/pg 1

Demon Flash Bandit (Wants a Decorative Preserved Bird for My Home)

 

Baby Pirates!

October 3rd 2013 8:51 am
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Ahoy Matey, I thought it would be nice to share a photo with my readers of Johnny Depp as a infant Captain Jack Sparrow. Of course, this photo was taken before he became "Captain", but it is nice to see him and his crew the way they looked when they were babies. Their rendition of Yo Ho HO, and bottle of rum" is delightful. Here is the link so you can check it out for yourself.

http://msn.foxsports.com/mlb/story/pittburgh-hospital-dr essing-up-babies-as-pirates-100213

Sail on over to the website, but be prepared to walk the plank since these pirate babies look quite fierce!

Demon Flash Bandit (Piracy in Babies)

 

Doggy IQ Tests

October 2nd 2013 8:34 am
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I have mentioned many times in past entries about how I was chosen by Sears as a genius. In fact, I love to bring up the subject even though I am normally a very modest dog who does not like to brag (no snide comments from the cat gallery). Yeah, I know cats like to read my diary even though they won't admit it. Anyway, I know some of you would like to know if you are also geniuses. If you are a dog reading this, I would say it is highly likely you are one, then this link is for you. It is a doggy IQ test that the humans can use to find out just how smart you are. Here is the link:

http://www.today.com/id/7087840/ns/today-today_week end_edition/t/how-smart-your-dog-give-him-iq-test/#.Ukw7dyDD _IV

Be sure and let us know what level of genius you possess, but don't expect the humans to be impressed. They are not easily impressed with brains, but if you let them rub your tummy, they usually feel better!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Genius)

 

Grooving and Howling at Woofstock

October 1st 2013 7:49 am
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Did you see more dogs than usual hitchhiking their way to Harrisburg, Pennsylvania over the weekend? They were attending Woofstock. This is an event for dogs that brings all dogs together for a fun time! Here is the link for more information:

http://www.cpaawoofstock.com/

From what I've heard, it went well. I plan to be there next year!

I'd like to thank Hershey and Van Winkle for the blue ribbon on my page!

Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Woofstock)

 
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