Adventures of a lead dog

(Page 12 of 224: Viewing Diary Entry 111 to 120)  
[First 10 Diary Entries] Page Links:  7  8  9  10  11  12  13  14  15  16  17  [Last 10 Diary Entries]  

I'M BACK!!!

December 3rd 2013 5:43 pm
[ View A Comments (7) ]

I'm back.....hold the applause!!! My absence is due to several problems. First, my "secretary" has been cleaning the house which is a complete waste of time since it is only going to get dirty again. Angel Zoom Smokey and myself are already busy messing it up. We had a meeting while Mommy was cleaning to do our planning for the future mess. My humans did not have their traditional Thanksgiving dinner because they went to a friend's house (Jeff had to work), and left us dogs alone for about 3 hours! Can you believe it? They left the thing for they should be most thankful to have in their lives (ME) to go eat a bird? I'm sympathetic with eating birds, but only at home. This has made me even more certain that birds need to die-as long as Mommy doesn't leave the house to go and eat it.
Saturday, my humans were at a wedding--at least William chose to stay home with Angel and myself. Jeff was the best man at his friends wedding and dogs were not included. I refused to put my pawtograph in his card. They will be sorry when they can't sell my pawtograph on ebay in a few years. I wrote my blog about it today:
www.demonflashbandit.blogspot.com
Conpawtulations to my pal, Izzy for being a dog of the day choice on dogster. I also want to thank everyone for my wonderful gifts for which I don't have time to thank individually in today's diary.
I hope that I don't go so long in the future without a diary entry. I know how much they mean to my pals. I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Missed Writing)

 

Thank you Bo Obama!

November 21st 2013 9:24 am
[ View A Comments (9) ]

I would like to thank Dogster for choosing my diary as a pick of the day. I want to conpawtulate my pal, Biscuit, for joining me in the dogster diary honor! Conpawtulations to Greedy who is the dog of the day on dogster! I hope it is a good day for Greedy. It is also my birthday, and I have received so many wonderful gifts for my birthday! Zaidie sent me a delicious cupcake for which I am thankful! Bodie sent me a heart, and Pepper sent me an emerald. I got 3 very tasty drumsticks from Whitley, Petey, and Mr. Jack Freckles-Sir-Licks-A-Lot. Riley sent me a delicious turkey, and the pumpkin pie that Hobo sent was wonderful.

Although dogster has me listed as 9 years old, I am actually 10 years old. When Mommy signed me up for dogster, Mommy had no idea how to unload my photo onto the internet. Since it took a couple of months, by the time it was listed, I ended up being the wrong "age".

I can't wait for my pawty later today. I don't know why Jeff has to work today. Shouldn't my birthday be a national holiday?

I have a link to share with my readers:
http://news.yahoo.com/obamacare-signs-up-its-first -dog--so-there-s-that--at-least-161850233.html;_ylt=AiXePKQW V9_tPsRiD89S53EJVux_;_ylu=X3oDMTJhY3Axamo3BG1pdANBVFQgMyBTdG 9yeSBKdW1ib3Ryb24gSG9tZSBDYWNoZWQEcG9zAzMyBHNlYwNNZWRpYUF0dF dpZGdldHJvbkFzc2VtYmx5;_ylg=X3oDMTFkcW51ZGliBGludGwDdXMEbGFu ZwNlbi11cwRwc3RhaWQDBHBzdGNhdANob21lBHB0A3BtaA--;_ylv=3

I 'm so pleased to see that Obamacare now includes dogs! Thanks Obama for thinking of us dogs. Thanks to Bo Obama for providing it for us dogs! I'm sure Bo thought of that one all by himself.

Demon Flash Bandit (Lucky Dog)

 

Eating Turkey and Napping

November 19th 2013 8:23 am
[ View A Comments (3) ]

Mommy wants me to thank the family of Randi, Margo, Sadie, Luv-You-Forever, and Casey for the paw and prayers you sent Mommy! Let's hope she can continue working for me. I'd hate to have to fire my own human mommy.

I didn't get around to writing a diary yesterday. You know how Mommy made that turkey for Angel Zoom Smokey and myself, We have been eating it for the past 2 days, and I think there is a third day's worth of meat on that bird. We were lucky we got one of the fatter birds because we both really pigged out on turkey meat! You are probably aware that Thanksgiving dinner makes the humans tired because of something in the turkey. I know it happened to me because I was going to write my diary (or actually dictate it to Mommy). I was so worn out, I just dropped over and fell asleep when I finished eating. It is official: a bird absolutely and positively kept me from posting a diary entry yesterday.
Yet another reason birds should die, and fortunately, a lot of turkeys will die in honor of Thanksgiving which is one of my favorite holidays!

Demon Flash Bandit (Hard at Work)

 

Sports Teams Named After Cats

November 17th 2013 10:25 am
[ View A Comments ]

I want to conpawtulate several of my pals who are diary picks today. Those dogs are: Anya, Buddy, and Pepper.

It has come to my attention that 2 of the local sports teams: The Detroit Tigers and the Detroit Lions are named after big cats. Why would they name their teams such stupid names? Wouldn't Detroit Dogs, Detroit Wolves or Detroit Coyotes be a much more intimidating name for a sports team? Who are the Tigers and Lions supposed to scare? The mice in the audience? Since they have had those names for a very long time, I won't go on a mission to change the names, but the humans should have had more sense than to name them after cats in the first place. However, humans are so stupid, I guess they would never have the brain power to "think it out properly". If you have teams to name in the future, ask a dog his or her opinion! That way you'll get a sensible name.

Demon Flash Bandit (Waiting for my Turkey)

 

Turkey for Us Dogs

November 16th 2013 6:27 pm
[ View A Comments (5) ]

I would like to thank Dogster for choosing my diary as a diary pick a couple of days ago. My secretary's health problems have been causing a problem with getting onto the computer to do my work. I think it is time for everyone to send prayers and power of the paw to keep her working for me, and not shirking her job like she has been doing the past couple of days! I want to thank my pals, Hershey and Van Winkle for the blue ribbon they gave me for my honor. I have such a wonderful group of pals. I also want to conpawtulate my pal, Ella for being chosen as a diary pick today!

Mommy no longer does much cooking because of her health problems, but she did put a big turkey in the oven today. The best thing about this turkey is that it is for Angel Zoom Smokey and myself. We won't get to eat it until tomorrow, but the house smells very good tonight.
If you ask my opinion (and you should), the humans should make turkeys for us more often. I think I'll get off the computer now, and dream of eating turkey. DELICIOUS!!!!!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Enjoys Turkey)

 

Demon Flash Bandit Underwear!

November 12th 2013 6:08 pm
[ View A Comments (5) ]

Thanks dogster for choosing my humble diary entry as a diary pick of the day. I think you chose it because we dogs aren't fond of snakes like some of the silly humans. Did you know some humans are even dumb enough to have snakes as pets? In my opinion, anyone who chooses a snake over a dog as a pet needs to be institutionalized for their own protection. I knew a dog once who tried gluing his fur that he didn't need anymore onto a snake to make him more cuddly. It did not work. It looks like a large furry worm, but the fish in the house got very excited. Fish think worms are gourmet food which means that fish don't usually eat very well.

This brings me to my topic for the day which is kind of strange since the topic has absolutely nothing in common with what I have been writing about up until now. This is a fashion observation so I'm sure all of my pals are going to be very excited to know my thoughts on fashion. I was sitting outside Walmart the other day which, for dogs who don't already know this, Walmart always draws people who dress in the height of fashion. There was this young guy walking in who seemed to have a problem with his pants. I'm not sure if he just couldn't decide whether to wear them or not since he looked like he had tried to put them on, but didn't go to much trouble to make sure they were on. The pants ended up hanging down around his knees. Anyway, I was about to make fun of how silly he looked until I had one of my genius ideas. I think he was hoping to buy a pair of underwear with my photo on it. It is the only logical reason I could think of that would make him wear his pants so low. I have had Demon Flash Bandit tshirts printed up. By the way, if any of you dogs are interested, let me know because Mommy can tell you how much they cost. They are printed on a per order basis so they are a little high, but I have told Mommy over and over that my photo on a tshirt is the most wonderful thing a human can wear! For those who might be interested, either contact me through dogster or at my email address: demonflashbandit@gmail.com.

I've got to go now....I think it is time for one of my new 3 meat dingo type bones. They are not dingo brand, but they are delicious!

Demon Flash Bandit (Fashionista Dog)

 

Snakes in a Church

November 11th 2013 5:18 pm
[ View A Comments ]

Mommy came in yesterday with a new bed for Angel Zoom Smokey. Angel was so excited to get her own bed. I think it is silly since she usually sleeps in the same bed with Mommy, but I'm okay with her having her own bed although I do think that money would have been better spent on me. I can always use a new dingo bone!

I saw on the news today that a church in Tennessee had 50 venomous snakes confiscated by the state. The pastor of the church thinks it is unconstitutional, but this dog agrees with the state on this one. A movie studio is looking into making a new movie in the line of Snakes on a Plane which will be called Snakes in a Church. There will be no service dogs in the movie because we dogs have enough sense to stay away from snakes. The main problem with the movie in the works now is getting the pastor to say, "I'm tired of these m. f. snakes--you get the idea. There was a lot of cussing in that original movie. Of course, this dog would be cussing too is I were in a plane that was full of icky, stupid snakes!

Demon Flash Bandit (Snakes in a Church)

 

Snakes in a Church

November 11th 2013 5:18 pm
[ View A Comments (2) ]

Mommy came in yesterday with a new bed for Angel Zoom Smokey. Angel was so excited to get her own bed. I think it is silly since she usually sleeps in the same bed with Mommy, but I'm okay with her having her own bed although I do think that money would have been better spent on me. I can always use a new dingo bone!

I saw on the news today that a church in Tennessee had 50 venomous snakes confiscated by the state. The pastor of the church thinks it is unconstitutional, but this dog agrees with the state on this one. A movie studio is looking into making a new movie in the line of Snakes on a Plane which will be called Snakes in a Church. There will be no service dogs in the movie because we dogs have enough sense to stay away from snakes. The main problem with the movie in the works now is getting the pastor to say, "I'm tired of these m. f. snakes--you get the idea. There was a lot of cussing in that original movie. Of course, this dog would be cussing too is I were in a plane that was full of icky, stupid snakes!

Demon Flash Bandit (Snakes in a Church)

 

Television Show Review: Under the Dome

November 8th 2013 10:39 am
[ View A Comments (1) ]

The television show, Under the Dome, is okay for the humans, but I think us dogs would be happier watching reruns of good shows like Underdog. Speed of lightning, bolt of thunder. dog who is better than the humans--sorry, I got a little carried away thinking about THE UNDERDOG!!!!! Underdog happens to be a personal hero of mine, and of most dogs. The Under the Dome show starts out in the beginning showing birds flying around which is okay, but I personally don't enjoy watching birds on television. Of course (spoiler alert) some of the birds do die and that part is hilarious. I laughed and laughed and then hoped for more good television shows about birds dying. Anyway, if you want to let your humans watch this show, go ahead. However, I would suggest you push to see Underdog instead. It is clearly a better television show-ask any dog!

Demon Flash Bandit (Pushing to Watch Underdog)

 

November 5th 2013 8:19 am
[ View A Comments ]

I have neglected to mention how Halloween turned out around here. It was the best Halloween ever!!! We only had about 12 kids trick or treating. Every year I get annoyed watching my brothers giving out MY CANDY to total strangers. I have complained the about this every day of every year!!!

This proves that my letter writing campaign throughout the neighborhood was successful. Next year I plan to drop the letter from an airplane.

 
  Sort By Oldest First

Demon Flash Bandit


 

Family Pets

Angel Zoom
Smokey

Subscribe

(What does RSS do?)