Adventures of a lead dog

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National Dog Day!

August 26th 2013 9:06 am
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Conpawtulations to my pal, Finley, for being a diary pick today. I also want to offer belated conpawtulations to my pals, Coco Rose and Reilly who were diary picks yesterday.

Happy National Dog Day to all my pals!!!! Finally, the humans have set aside a day to celebrate the most important thing in their lives: DOGS!
I just hope there is no national Bird Day, because, if there was, I would be one very mad dog!!! However, I would be okay with a National Bird Killing Day! I have to stop writing and do some research. A bird killing day sounds like a great holiday to me!

Demon Flash Bandit (Celebrating National Dog Day)

 

Super Bark Can Wait Until Necessary

August 25th 2013 11:50 am
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Last night Angel Zoom Smokey and myself were watching the movie, Bolt, and I made Mommy laugh because I went to the door, and used my "paw power" to open the door--just like Bolt used his super powered paw. I am saving my super bark for another occasion. Anyway, Bolt was in 3D so the dog was extra cool only Angel and myself refused to wear the 3D glasses. We, being dogs, do have standards. Besides, we think it is only the humans who look super silly wearing them.

Demon Flash Bandit (Super Dog)

 

Humans or Birds: Who Cares About Either?

August 24th 2013 9:02 am
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Sometimes life presents situations where a dog does not know which side for which to cheer. This dilemma is painfully apparent in Calgary, Canada. Hawks have been attacking mailhumans there. Which side does a dog care about: the birds or the humans who deliver mail? If you ask my opinion, the best option is to stay home and not worry about the outcome of the event. Humans or birds: not a lot of difference to his dog. Here is the link for those who want to read more about it:
http://now.msn.com/hawks-attack-mailmen-in-calgary-canada


Demon Flash Bandit (Mailman or Birds): Does it really matter? No, it does not!

 

Humans or Birds: Who Cares About Either?

August 24th 2013 9:02 am
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Sometimes life presents situations where a dog does not know which side for which to cheer. This dilemma is painfully apparent in Calgary, Canada. Hawks have been attacking mailhumans there. Which side does a dog care about: the birds or the humans who deliver mail? If you ask my opinion, the best option is to stay home and not worry about the outcome of the event. Humans or birds: not a lot of difference to his dog. Here is the link for those who want to read more about it:
http://now.msn.com/hawks-attack-mailmen-in-calgary-canada


Demon Flash Bandit (Mailman or Birds): Does it really matter? No, it does not!

 

Sunny Bacon

August 23rd 2013 9:48 pm
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Today I write bearing good news on 2 different fronts.

First, there is a new dog in the White House to help Bo run the county. That dog is Sunny Obama from my home state of Michigan. I wrote a blog about the new dog yesterday, and this is the link to share it with my readers.
http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=5313518358 113749799#editor/target=post;postID=7043315234112678029;onPu blishedMenu=posts;onClosedMenu=posts;postNum=1;src=postname


Second, it is time for a dog to book a flight to Chicago, Illinois because there is a restaurant there (Burke's Bacon Bar) that serves bacon on all their sandwiches except for the vegetarian one, and I am sure that if you ask, they will add bacon to that one too. This is bound to be a very popular restaurant among dogs. I wonder if they will have any bacon left to serve to the humans. Here is the link:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/08/22/burkes-bacon -bar_n_3797455.html

Bacon, it has been on my training table since I was a puppy!

Demon Flash Bandit (Reporting Good News)

 

Lasers for Killing Fleas: A Great Idea!

August 22nd 2013 12:28 pm
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I saw an article today about a new way to zap bugs--with lasers. I don't know about the rest of the dogs out there, but it is about time the humans came up with something to kill the most annoying bug of our time: the flea!!! I have to go now and find out where I can order this nifty new product. I hope they have some that I can wear in a holster so I can look like one of those super cowboy type dogs. Just forget the cowboy hat....this dog hates hats!!!

Demon Flash Bandit (Fleas Better Watch Out)

 

Demon Flash Bandit: Consumer "Watchdog"

August 21st 2013 10:09 am
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My fellow dogs, I am writing this today to get a class action lawsuit started against Nabisco. Why do I think this is something that needs to be done? Because a teacher in New York (I think it was probably a dog), who specializes in math, has calculated the amount of cream in the double stuff Oreos, and the double stuff do not have twice the amount of cream because there is only 1.86% which means that we dogs who eat them are being cheated out of .14%. This is not acceptable, and Angel Zoom Smokey who is particularly fond of vanilla double stuff Oreos is so mad she said she is going to go to the corporate offices of Nabisco to take the extra cream out of their hides. which probably would not taste that good. You do not mess with Angel Zoom Smokey's treats if you know what is good for you!!!

I'm sure I am not the only dog who is tired of having products misrepresented by large corporations who are only interested in profits. Please join Angel Zoom Smokey and myself in this most important lawsuit.

Here is the link for those who want to read more about it:
http://now.msn.com/double-stuf-oreos-do-not-have-twice- the-creme-of-regular-oreos

Demon Flash Bandit (Consumer "Watchdog")

 

Norris the Cat was Framed!

August 20th 2013 8:10 am
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Today my diary is right out of the Internet news. A cat named Norris, who lives in England, has been falsely accused of stealing the neighbor's laundry. Let's be logical here...why would a cat steal laundry? Most cats hate to wear clothing about as much as Angel Zoom Smokey and myself so it does not make sense that a cat would bother to steal clothing. This brings me to my conclusion. You know that a bird had to steal that laundry from the neighbors and then blame it on the innocent cat! Birds have long been enemies of cats-probably because cats see birds for what they really are: SNACKS!!! Here is the link for those who want to read more about this sweet cat.

http://now.msn.com/norris-the-cat-steals-laundry-fro m-neighbors-and-owners-want-to-return-it

Demon Flash Bandit (Defending Cat)

 

Reptilian Aliens and Zebra Mussel Feces

August 18th 2013 8:55 am
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I wrote a diary entry yesterday, and it was outstanding since I was a diary pick yesterday so writing a more "normal" one was not an option. As you know, my diary readers are a special group that would recognize an inferior diary entry from the smell alone!

What was my diary entry about? It was about the conspiracy theory that the royal family (in England) are actually reptilian aliens from another planet. When I wrote about this yesterday, I just assumed that it was a silly hoax because I think most problems with the royal family are more likely caused by generations of in-breeding. That was until I went to share the link with my readers, and the computer's Internet service crashed. I tried to get back on the Internet until I finally gave up because it was not going to happen. This was not a mere coincidence. This was an elaborate ruse to keep me from posting the truth about the royal family. Then I get on the Internet today, and see that there is new information about the accident that took the life of Diana. As William Shakesdog once said, "there is something rotten in the state of Denmark, and I want to go and sniff it better".

Here is yet another interesting link in the news today:

http://oaklawn.patch.com/groups/around-town/p/drin k-up-zebra-mussel-dumps-flavor-your-tap-water

My main question about this link is: just who is an expert on the taste of zebra mussel feces, and does anyone really want to talk to that person? I know I don't.
Until tomorrow......watch out for reptilian aliens (the royal family), and avoid drinking water that tastes like zebra mussels feces!!

Demon Flash Bandit (Sharing Latest "News")

 

Demon Flash Bandit: Boss Dog~

August 16th 2013 8:41 am
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For those who have been wondering why I haven't written, check out my blog at www.demonflashbandit.blogspot.com. Several days ago, I got my 2 quarter pounders with bacon at McDonalds, and my bacon was burned. I know it is hard to believe that a human could make bacon taste bad, but they managed to do so. Therefore, I got a job as a manager at the local McDonalds so that I could fire those responsible for burning my bacon. My 2 more recent blog entries cover my time as the "undercover manager" there. In addition, my lazy human has some "tooth Infection" and claims she isn't feeling like getting on the computer. If I had that attitude, I would never have become an undercover manager at McDonalds because I missed a lot of great naps over that job! However, my new reality show, Demon Flash Bandit: Boss Dog would have never made it onto television.

Demon Flash Bandit (Boss Dog)

 
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