May 9th 2008 9:40 am
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On Fox News Network there was a piece this morning that Handsome Men, Better Looking Men, are less faithful to their partners, and in fact do not make as good a partner as less attractive men.

Well, I suppose I have to make an admission. When I was alive I have to admit I was stunning. An absolute gorgeous specimen of canine attractiveness. Even in my oldest years I aged gracefully, maintaining my charm such as Sean Connery.

I was unfaithful to Mom. Yes. I had an affair. It was while we were living in Cincinnati in our little Cape Cod. It was with that lovely Bad Girl neighbor, Jeannie. I couldn't help myself. I would saunter over to Jeannie's house and spend the afternoon or evening. Sometimes I would stay all night. Sure, I still loved Mom. She was my Mommy, after all. I always returned home to her in the end. Yet I couldn't help the allure of snuggling on the couch with Jeannie. Getting my butt rubbed by Jeannie. Sharing an Ice Cream Cone with Jeannie. Jeannie would sometimes walk by the house and whistle for me. I would become frantic and Mom would be forced to open up the door to let me out so I could take a walk with Jeannie.

Jeannie moved away after a few years. It hurt me so that I ended it, despite regular visits to her new house. I just never forgave her for moving out of such close range.

Mom remained Mom. Hurt of course, but she stood by me. I did have a about two years before I died and when my affair with Jeannie ended. In that time I was completed devoted to Mom. I suppose I just couldn't help myself. My good looks just overwhelmed my sense of morality. It works for the celebrities doesn't it?