May 8th 2009 12:31 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 5 people already have ]
I fear greatly, now that I am gone, for the Integrity of the Mulligan Compound. Oh, Pennie is kind and nurturing, but she just doesn't run the place like I do, or did.
Since I left on Monday, Four, yes, 4, large boxes have been received via Fed Ex or UPS. Not one has been inspected for drugs, weapons of mass destruction, nuclear waste, or improvised explosive devises.
No one has gone through Mom's purse. I ALWAYS went through Mom's purse. It was particularly important to search out and, with NO regard for my own personal safety, find and chew up any gum she might have. For dog's sake, that gum could easily be plastique, posing as gum, ready to blow up the mini-van at any moment. Mom took to hiding the gum in the glove box. By the way, Dad, that is how all the scratches appeared on the glove box. I sniffed out that gum in the glove box and of course Mom's mere act of hiding it further added to my suspicion that it must be plastique. Alas, I did not thoroughly trust Mom. What better way to hide as a fiend? Room Mom. Computer Lab Volunteer. All great covers.
Then there were the Mulligan Mental Exercises. As the human brain ages, it has been shown that increased mental stimulation can actually help defeat some of the natural decrease in function. Therefore I developed my Mulligan Mental Exercises, MME, to keep Mom's brain functioning.
Mom would prepare lunch for Little Lad, bagels with cinnamon. While Mom was, oh say, pouring Little Lad some milk, I would eat the bagels and completely lick the plate clean. Mom would come back and wonder: "Did I make Little Lad's lunch? Hmm."
I would hide one of Mom's shoes. Much like a crossword puzzle stimulates the human mind as they think of the answer to the clue; Mom would have to search through the house, thinking: "Where did Mulligan hide my shoe today?" This also helped raise Mom's adrenalin level, as of course she would not discover she was missing a shoe until it was time to leave, and now she had to go hunt for her shoe first. And of course, don't forget balance, as Mom traipsed through the house wearing just the one shoe.
Mental Calculation: How much bread to buy? I was THE best at stealing loaves of bread. This MME was aimed at getting Mom to use her math skills as she had to calculate how much bread the family would use versus how much bread I would steal, and then figure out how much bread to purchase.
Yes, I fear greatly that Pennie will simply not be able to keep the Mulligan Compound up to my standards. MulliFit, Mulli Ab Machine, my Healing Vapors, my MME, searching ALL that came into the house, and more, is a lot to heap on Pennie's shoulders.
Leave A Comment | 5 people already have Mulli, I am SO glad that you are continuing to send us your diary messages. The way I see it, we Dogster pals could try to send Pennie ESP reminders of the MMEs. As your pawrents age, it is important that they receive supplements to the exercising the Lads will give them.
Daisy in Seattle Mulli, I am SO glad that you are continuing to send us your diary messages. The way I see it, we Dogster pals could try to send Pennie ESP reminders of the MMEs. As your pawrents age, it is important that they receive supplements to the exercising the Lads will give them.
Daisy in Seattle Mulligan, relax. I know you're new to the Bridge and still figuring out how things work here, but you can still keep a close eye on your compound. While you won't be able to personally inspect your Mom's purse, you won't need to. You'll now realize that your Mom is not prone to smuggle plastique. If you're really concerned, just whisper in Pennie's ear- she can handle the security detail.
I'm sorry you were in such a rush to get here, but you're young and therefor somewhat foolish. You'll have plenty of time to mature here, should you wish to. You may also choose to watch your compound and family anytime, go cloud hopping, meet new friends, play practical jokes- the possibilities are endless.
Our cloudmates are Mokey and Ben, two dear friends of mine who also came to the Bridge recently. Please try not to snore too loudly or pass gas- some Earth habits are hard to break...
Oh, dear, you look sleepy.... Pull a little bit of cloud over you
and snuggle up; you've had a long journey.
*Loud snores soon emanate from Honey's cloud, along with noxious vapors*
*Sigh* Good thing he's handsome, right Mokey? Hey Mulligan,
With helpful tips and hints from you, Pennie will learn to do some of things that you used to.
Just whisper them to her from time to time. I get messages from Cookie all the time. Mulli, you inspire me. Clearly, I haven't been challenging Finkmom enough. I'm too small to counter surf, but I'm sure I can hide her shoe. Pennie will learn take care of the Mulligan Compound in her own special way. We are thinking about your mudder.
Love, Gussie
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May 8th 2009 at 6:43 pm