May 21st 2008 5:20 pm
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It's that time of year, just before summer when Mom begins to realize that the hooligans will be home soon to interfere with the scant quality time that she has to spend with me, Mulligan. She also realizes that without the Public School System fortifying their little brains for weeks on end, their neurons may shrivel and dry up. Mom has been on the Enrichment Search. Swim lessons and taekwondo to keep those muscles from atrophy. Lego Camp for Little Lad. Lego NXT robot camp for Middle Lad. Puppet class. Art class. Boy scout camp. Piano lessons. Summer band. The lads should be fully enriched with every possible vitamin combination of fortification if Mom has her way, yet still have plenty of free time to "just play."
Mulligan: "Mom, with all your concern for Enrichment for the Lads; how come I don't get to take any classes to get my Enrichment?"
Mom: "Mulligan, I don't have to worry about the Lads biting anybody. Even when Little Lad was back in preschool and that Little Girl bit him and drew blood even, he did not bite her back."
Mulligan: "Mom! Did Little Lad catch the Rabies? Did he foam at the mouth?"
Mom: "No, Mulligan. Preschools require all students to be fully vaccinated, so Little Lad did not catch the Rabies. But that's not the point. Little Lad and Middle Lad say "please" and "thank you" and don't try to dominate everyone. They share and take turns and follow directions."
Mulligan: "Well . . . um. I AM fully vaccinated. And I don't eat Markers. It was Pennie that ate the markers. I only ate Oldest Lad's Homework that ONE time. Oh, and that glue stick I ate. And I have never tried to eat the Lego Mindstorm Robots."
Mom: "Mulligan, you are AFRAID of the Lego Mindstorm Robots. How about if I just Home School Enrich you?"
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