The Good, The Bad, & The Doxies (with apologies to clint eastwood)

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Moonlight Becomes You

September 3rd 2009 2:25 pm
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That's what they say. Can't prove it by my mom though! Yesterday mom decided to take some pictures of me in our little plastic swimming pool. She put it up yesterday morning....and I promptly got in and out through out the day. It is as hot as the surface of the sun right now...and it felt good. She never really got the photo she wanted.....I couldn't sit still without jumping in the water, and the photo challenge was near water not IN water. Oh well. After a tough day of posing...and heat I spent the rest of the day and evening resting. After my bedtime snack and stroll around the yard, I retired with Helga to our crate. Until around 11:45pm...about 15 minutes after mom went to sleep. Frantic urgent bark...I need to go out. And I did have to go!!! Back to the crate....mom settled back in bed; 5 minutes later, frantic bark again. She lets me out and after strolling the backyard leisurely while mom muttered....I did manage to go again. BOL! Mom ushered me unceremoniously into the house and into my crate, shutting the door a little harder than I thought necessary...but oh well! I waited a few minutes.....frantic urgent I HAVE TO GO NOW bark once again. Now, mom did not just fall off the turnip truck....but on the off chance my tummy was having a problem, she got up once again. She opened the patio door and I raced across the patio & across the lawn as if the hounds of hell were after me....and jumped straight into the pool. The moonlight shimmering on my shiny black fur, the cool water, the quiet....well almost quiet. Mom was making some kind of hissing noise like air out of a tire. I think she was yelling quietly....there was enough moonlight to read her face...and it was not good. I was unceremoniously dried and put back in my crate...where I cried pitifully. Beaten...she opened the crate stumbled back to bed and slept with 2 Dachshunds....one slightly damp and smelling like wet dog!!

Moonlight swims......you have to try them. Mom...not so much a fan!!

 

Just What Are We Saving It For????

November 4th 2008 4:59 am
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Now I don't know how it is in your part of the world but in my world...California, USA... Sunday was something called Daylight Savings time. Clocks were turned back one hour. So what you say...dogs don't care about time. Oh Yeah???? This Dog does!!!

I get fed by the clock....at 5 pm the clock in my tummy says it is time to eat. Now that we are saving time, mom says "No Ellie it is four o'clock..you have an hour before your dinner"!!!

Well, not by my tummy Lady. NO BODY TURNED BACK MY TUMMY PEOPLE!!!

I am more flexible about breakfast, I do sometimes sleep in. Lunch is flexible cause of mom's schedule, same with my afternoon snack. But at 5 pm I WANT MY DINNER and at 9pm I WANT MY BEDTIME SNACK. This has made for a miserable few days, because I am not shy about making my feelings known. I knocked my bowl off it's perch...stainless steel on tile makes an impressive sound but does not make mom happy. I have even got on her lap and stared at her face to face...letting her know just how unhappy I am. But the woman does not bend. In case you are thinking it is a lot of meals for a tiny dog...I need to eat many small meals for my tricky tummy. Many meals ON TIME I might add. I hear we are getting a new President. I don't much listen to all the campaign promises...I am much to busy being a dog. But you can guarantee I will be contacting the winner to have this travisty changed immediately. This will not do...leave the clock alone....Please...My tummy is depending on it.

 

Dachshunds...Start Your Engines!!!!!!!!

June 14th 2008 6:19 am
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I MADE IT!!! I MADE IT!!!! I MADE IT!!!!

Whew..now I got that out of my system. I am so excited I can hardly sit still. Yes, I KNOW..what else is new, I am a Dachshund! As you may or may not know, my big dream has been to run in the Weinernationals at Los Alamitos Racetrack. I submitted my entry letter. Then last Saturday I received the call & mom heard the fateful words..."Ellie has been chosen". Oh My Dog! I am beyond excited. We called everyone we knew and pup mailed all our friends. This is a BIG deal. The money raised goes to a good cause, the Seal Beach Animal Shelter. Friends.....I will be RACING!!

Helga, my coach is drafting up my training schedule. She has even offered to taste a bit of my food before I eat it to make sure it is up to standard. What a good sister!! Last night I did wind sprints in the back yard. I really smoked Helga & my cousin Tink, the Chihuahua. I left them in the dust! I will be watching past Race videos and Helga is reading me articles on Carb loading. I've asked for a personal Masseuse & maybe a Sports Psychologist, but right now the only other member of my training camp is my cousin Tink. Due to the fact she wears a collar with the word "Tink" in rhinestones in big letters, I feel she is more posse material to a Rap group than a serious racing team......but she does try to help by running with me. That bling is weighing her down...BOL! She should try to run as I do..Au Naturale!

As July 19th draws nearer I will kick my training into high gear.
Right now I run like a rocket to mom just for the words "Run Ellie Run", but I've heard whispered rumors that as it gets closer to race day some bribery in the form of liverwurst may be employed! Just to make sure I keep my focus when the crowd roars!!! No worries...as far as we know liverwurst is not on the list of banned substances. I can not afford a Barry Bonds type scandal this early in my career. So on July 19th check your local TV listings...a 7 -1/2 pound shiny black dog will be racing with the fastest Weiners in the West! TEAM ELLIE RACING is in high gear.

Helga.....are you sure they are going to be able to see me when they do the view from the Goodyear Blimp????? Have you heard from Sports Illustrated yet??????

 

Attention: Some Chocolate is good for you!

February 27th 2008 4:55 pm
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Now dont go rushing out and grab up some candy bars..the chocolate I am talking about is special. This CHOCOLATE is a beautiful Cheasapeake Bay Retreiver. He was found wandering in Washington State, a yellow ball in his mouth, hobbling on badly fractured legs. Chocolate was introduced to our Fundawg Group by our good pal BUTCH. Butch is quick with a joke and he is the only dog we know with his own island,but underneath that wisecracking facade is a heart of gold. He asked all of us Fundawgs to keep Chocolate in our thoughts & prayers. Chocolate was sent to Washington State University for surgery on his legs, never letting go of the yellow ball, all he owned in this world. Chocolate survived the 6 hour surgery and is now undergoing therapy, his yellow ball never far from his side.
He quickly became a favorite of the Dr.'s and Vet Tech's. Click on his link, read his story and you will see why. Now our group, Dawgs Just Wanna have Fun, AKA Fundawgs are pretty special. All Butch had to do is ask and we respond...we are pretty proud of that. FLECKEN and his mom are working on a special blanket to send him with all our names on it. KIKO organized a drive to send toys and gift cards to Chocolate. Each day we click on his link to see his progress. With so many sad things in this world it is just nice to feel good about a story. Heartfelt thanks go to the Docs & Techs who have been taking care of him and for all the folks who have followed his story.

Helga & I fell in love with Chocolate & wanted to send him something. And yellow seemed to be his favorite. Our choice was a toy we called Spikey 2, named for the Fundawg mascot Spikey; a spiked squeeky toy that resides with all of us Fundawgs a few weeks at a time. You can see him on the page Helga & I have together...we took him to Hollywood to see Lassie's star on the walk of fame when he stayed with us. Mom guarded him like a member of the Secret Service while he was in our care...we do not have the best reputation with toys that squeek. To make a long story short, those of you who know us well, know where this is headed. Mom got a Spikey for us to send to sweet Chocolate. And here is where it gets ugly. Trust me, we are not proud of this. While mom was out, one of us; and as usual...we are not saying who...got into Mom's office where the gift was hidden. But not for long! When mom returned..well, let's just say it wasn't pretty. We of course were very contrite. Mom yelled, we hid and now she has to shop for Chocolate again. Chocolate pal...we are sorry, your gift will be on the way soon. It will be there in time for you to be done with therapy and on your way to a furever home.

If you have a moment, please bow your head for a moment of silence for poor Spikey 2. Gone to that place all good squeeky toys go. And while you are doing that, if you are reading this from a home that loves you and cares for you; please give thanks. Not all of us dogs are so lucky. But for Chocolate...his luck seems to have turned.

 

Dr. Dr. .......Gimme the News!!

November 7th 2007 11:20 am
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Well..it's been a while since my last entry. My typist broke her paw & was out of commission for a bit. Things are getting back to normal, of course mom says living with two doxies is just a little past normal!

Today was a big day! Helga & I had to see Dr. Yamaguchi for a check-up & our rabies shots. After that the plan was to go get our updated dog license because our's has expired. We no longer want to be fugitives on the run. It all began uneventfully. We got out of the truck & ran into the waiting room at the Vet's, anxious to let everyone know we were there. A big kitty was in a carrier, sitting quietly. Apparently trying to be incognito...but this revelation is in hindsight. I love kitty's so much...I ran right over..pulling my sister Helga with me to see the kitty & say hi. Forgetting that (A) Helga does not share my love of cats &(B) Not all kittys are happy to see dogs. This kitty really had a set of lungs & let out a yowl that could curl paint off the wall. Now all of the dogs who up until now had paid the kitty no mind..began to bark!! Oops..my bad. For those of you taking notes...this gets you put in a room immediately. Small dogs causing riots trumps dogs sitting quietly. On the good news front..I have managed to gain some weight from 7.5 pounds to 8 pounds!! Dr. Y was very happy & impressed. After being shot in the hip, meds squirted down my nose & being told to brush my teeth better..I was FREE!! I only screamed once during the nail clipping.

Helga & I were sitting quietly while mom paid. Suddenly the door opens & in walks a beautiful Rottweiler. A big Rottweiler. I immediately went to say hello..dragging Helga along. For those of you considering a tandem leash..take note, not always a good thing! Koby, the Rottie, when he did finally notice me, did not seem impressed. How could he not be impressed with a small black dog dragging along a slightly larger red dog with the whites of her eyes showing??? I tried telling him about my Rottie friends Sadie Lady, Maui & our neighbor Chopper. No dice. Not even when I told him I had the honorary title of Dachsweiler bestowed upon me. When Koby got on the scale I could see why. Compared to his 125 pounds my 8 pounds arent even a blip on his radar! His loss!!! But the best part of the morning occured next. We stopped for gas & when mom got out of the truck to pump gas...we helpfully stepped on the button to auto-lock the doors, with the keys inside! Mom was not happy...also inside was her cell phone. Hey..this whole opposeable thumb thing is not our fault!! A nice man let her borrow his phone to call AAA who happened to be nearby. Friends, if you're still taking notes...AAA comes faster if you have dogs locked in a car...probably kids too..but we didnt have any of those. The AAA man unlocked the door as soon as he stopped laughing...and didn't charge mom. He said we made his day..we were sitting in the drivers seat looking like we were ready to take off. Drive it like you stole it...BOL!!!

So..we came directly home. Mom is so done. She says she is not up to taking us to renew our license today. In fact, if we are not careful...she may make the call to turn us in!!!!

 

Refrigerator's...They Are Not Just For People Anymore!

May 15th 2007 2:56 pm
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Well, as you may or may not know...I struggle with my weight. Keeping weight on is difficult for me. But my mom & the vet have hit on a new regimen, plus dear friends have been giving me tips. The exciting part of this is I get to eat 5 to 6 small meals a day!!! I recently tried getting mom up at 2 am to give me a snack a couple of times..but she was not buying it & in fact was downright rude about the whole thing!! I mean make up your mind lady...you want the cute little black dog to gain weight? Well, feed her around the clock...but apparently that is not going to happen.

But today my friends...ah yes today! I made a wonderous discovery. Our mom hangs a towel on the door of the fridge to wipe her paws on when she is working in the kitchen. While mom was otherwise occupied this morning I found that if you pull on that towel with all your might.....the door opens!! Yes! I felt like a choir should sing & I should be bathed in a glorious light. The refrigerator, open whenever I want (or at least till they see me!). This is to good to be true. I give my sister a high five!

I quickly stand on the refrigerator shelf. Cheeses, a baked chicken..Pizza!!!!! How do you get a pizza box open you might ask...well you nudge it with your long doxie nose till it falls out of the fridge onto the floor. And if the pizza Gods are with you...the lid falls open. Helga, do you want puparoni or sausage???? What...Mom's coming! Yikes!!!

Now for those of you taking notes for your own refrigerator raid..here is an important warning. Once the pizza box falls to the floor it is impossible to get it back in the refrigerator without opposeable thumbs. So unless you can quickly scoot it under the couch before your mom comes.....grab a piece of pizza & RUN and I mean RUN!!!!!!!

Hey Helga...do you have the phone number for Pizza Hut...

 

Does The Olympics Give Gold Medals For The Dogpaddle??????

March 16th 2007 1:24 pm
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Well, it finally happened. As I have mentioned in previous diary entries...we have a new pond in our backyard. And as you may or may not know...Helga & I love the water. If you are thinking like I'm thinking...silly on Mom's part right? Right.

Today Mom heard a big splash & ran to the yard to find me sopping wet head to toe, shaking myself dry. And Tsunami like waves in the pond, not to mention the terrorized fish darting about. I do not swim gracefully & gently as does my dear sister. No...not me. In true Ellie fashion I go big or not at all!! I dive in head first, pop up head above water & swim. I would make a retriever proud. Mom was scared, but as she had left the shelf for plants empty for just such a scenario..I was able to swim to the ledge & get out on my own. Unfortunately my drowned rat condition gave the caper away. Helga ran to the far corner of the yard when she heard mom come out the screen door. Her momma didn't raise no fool.

I am no worse for wear, a little smelly from pond water so mom is talking the "bath" word. But an idea is forming in my brain. Maybe I should give up running races & concentrate on my swimming. By the time the summer Olympics rolls around I should be in top form. Helga...get that Australian kid who won all those medals on the phone....I know he could give me some pointers.

 

A Rose By Any Other name...Part Two

March 8th 2007 4:36 pm
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Some of you readers are familiar with my encounter with my Rottweiler neighbor, Chopper, as detailed in a previous diary entry. Since that exciting encounter there have been some interesting developements. I have a dear friend SADIE LADY who is a beautiful Rottweiler. I did attempt to inform Chopper that I was personal friends with a Rottweiler & did indeed consider myself a smaller version of his noble breed. Hoping this small chat would break the ice. But to no avail. He continues to bark & lunge at the fence when Helga & I cavort in our backyard.

If you would please be so kind go to Sadie's page & then compare mine. In numerous pictures one can not help but see the startling resemblance. Sadie had graciously listened to me on numerous occasions point out the similarities in our profiles & our markings. To me it was like looking at mirror images. Then I received an email from Sadie bestowing the honor of Dachsweiler upon me. I may be the only Dachsweiler in existence...but I am persistent & vocal. I will try very hard to be an asset, and not as my loving sister so rudely stated, an embarrassment. I am in seventh heaven. I immediately ran outside to inform Chopper of this startling new developement. He was not impressed, and was called inside by his owner for bad behavior. Hummmph. Serves him right.

Maybe someday he will acknowlege me. But it does not matter. I know now I am a Dachsweiler. Thank you Sadie Lady...you are sweet & gracious. So if in your daily travels you see a Rottweiler, smile...for they truly have hearts of gold.

Helga...has the mail come??? Did the Rottweilers send my secret decoder ring & the password yet???

 

Pond/Pool...Sounds the Same to Me!

January 28th 2007 2:16 pm
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Big excitement here. Mom brought home this big thing the other day. She dragged it into the back yard. Now she is marking a place & starting to dig. Dig!!??? Well, why didnt she say something??? Nothing we like to do better than to dig. Here's the best part....Helga & I overheard her tell Dad it was a pond. And when it was filled with water it would have fish inside. Water?? WATER!!!!!!..we are so there!!! Last year Helga & I were embarrassed by the size of our pool. The word cheesy comes to mind. But this...this has definite possibilities. This is shaping up to be very interesting. Now we don't know what fish are, havent a clue. But hopefully they will not mind us swimming with them. Or at the very least not get in our way. We will keep you posted when it is completed.

Helga...stop watching Jaws on TV. You are such a worry-wort. Mom said fish...not shark!!!! Have you seen my towel & my suntan lotion? Who used the goggles last???

 

Dear Santa Paws...Please define "Good"...

December 1st 2006 5:38 am
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Mom said Helga & I should be real concerned about the list. You know the one. I think we need it defined. Are we talking a whole years worth of transgressions...or just the ones during the month of December?

Reviewing some of our more notable escapades..I feel I must tell you that a good attorney would probably be able to get us an aquittal, given that a jury of our peers would certainly understand.

Let's begin with last years stealing of baby Jesus from the little manger & the subsequent race around the house with mom in hot pursuit. A good friend Spike pointed out we were just trying to show Baby Jesus a good time, since it was his birthday. (Helga...make a note of Spike's phone number for the character witness list, please). Mom has moved him this year. We will miss him.

Ok..we will have to mention the hearing aid incident. Yes..a VERY expensive, high tech device was destroyed. But..in our defense..the owner of said device left it in a place where it was easily accessible to doxies. Said person should bear some part of the blame, in our humble opinion. Also..there was no smoking gun as it were, since neither one of us was seen with the mangled pieces on or near their person.

Yes, there have been numerous toilet paper unrollings, shredding of papers (like we knew Tax Papers meant something), items of clothing chewed. Yes ...there have been time's when I have been found on the dining room table shoving food off to my acomplice, Helga.

But we feel you must take into account all the good we have accomplished. Do you know how many times we have kept this house safe from intruders by barking immediately when we hear the slightest sound? Mom & Dad would certainly have frozen since they have no fur, if not for Helga & I getting in their bed to keep them warm. Can you imagine their stress level if they did not have us climbing in their laps everyday to give them millions of kisses. Or making them laugh with our antics?

Santa Paws...I feel before arbitrarily placing us on the naughty list, one must look at the whole picture. Mitigating circumstances were at play in almost every incident. At most they were only misdeweiners. I respectfully rest my case.

Please enjoy the milk & cookies we left you. Maybe dont eat the one on the left..the one with the tiny bite out of it.
Merry Christmas... Ho Ho Ho!

 
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