I'm watching

Yes I'm watching mom and my baby brother both Jake and I are and we just keep shaking our heads at this little well not so little now he is getting bigger everyday but mom's right he is a beast a shark and disaster looking for a place to happen he just keeps finding the places to have 1 mom has her hands full big time Jake and I will keep watch it is kinda of funny don't tell mom BOL

Justin's G/F Sophie & I

Last night Justin's girlfriend Sophie spent the night with me I baby sat her yesterday while her mommy had to go to a graduation and another engagement, so when it came for us to go to bed last night she came and got in my lap and sat looking at his picture and we both had a good talk and a good cry over the fact that Justin was now gone, I told her he was looking down on us from rainbow bridge and that he was no longer in any pain and that only good things and fun things happen at rainbow bridge.
and that 1 day we would both be there with him and we would all cross over together and everything would be great, but for now we just have to wait to be called and pray for him and know that he is looking down upon us and keeping us happy, we cried for over an hour and fell a sleep in each others arm's

Justin Is Coming Home

They called to tell me that Justin's ash's were there at the hosp and ready for him to come home I can only tell you it is going to be the next hardest thing I will do with him after the the day he passed, its going to be a good and bad day for me

My Heart Is Heavy

Today on the 20th of may at 9 am this morning, my sweet prince and gentle man pass away of live cancer, I could not see him suffer any longer, he was not eating nor could he walk and with cancer many other things come into play, Justin and I had just finished watch my father his grandpa suffer from congestive heart failure.
Justin missed his grandpa so much and when we found out he had liver cancer I was crushed this was not supposed to happen not to my son he and I were to go to rainbow bridge together, but this was not to be and with tears rolling down my eye's I put him in the car and took him to his favorite doctor and like the gentle man he was he went to sleep and I know that my holding him after and crying was only a shell cause he was on his way to rainbow bridge to be with his big brother and sister and his grandpa and the rest of the family that are waiting for the us to join them.
I know he is in a better place but I spent the day crying and wondering why him what did we do for this to happen, the only thing I know is that I will miss him more every day and at some point I can't wait to see him and his big brother and sister so we can all be together forever and cross over with all holding hands and love in our hearts

Well mom think's I didn't get the msg

But I did, I know I dieing and mom is doing everything she can to make my life better but with liver cancer who knows but mom is doing the best she can she does everything for me well almost everything.
She said that I can have anything I want to eat or any toy rather eat and I love that pumpkin stuff and boy does it work but I'm also trying to keep mom happy so we are trying for each other we love each other so is so hard for me to write need a break

Well I'm Still Looking

Mom told me that grandpa is at rainbow bridge now with my big brother Jake and big sister LiLBits but I'm still smell him and mom says that will be a forever smell and not to lose it, I miss him so much he was my bestest friend my hero and now I just have mom and grandma and we are getting thur the best we can but I still have to have mom tell me its ok now he is in a better place and not suffering any more, I want my grandpa

Grandpa is sick

Mom and I are helping take care of my favorite grandpa he is my hero besides my big brother, but it can be hard cause he is really sick and mommy said we can only do so much that the nurses who come in and help us can do what we can't, so were doing the best we can mom says so I just love on him

Sheeee Here at least for a few days

My girlfriend is here for the next few days while her mom moves them into a new house and we didn't want her getting stepped on or some moving person tripping over her so Sophie is here with mom and me and already we got in to a fight about who gets what chewy, mom broke it up and took away the chewy and we made up a few mins after so everything is ok she is on look out BOL she looks out the glass doors to make sure we are not going to get attacked BOL As if but mom say's to me remember she looks out her front door all the time so its normal for her.
I said ok and laid down behind her to let her know everything is ok and that we will play later after our morning nap. this is going to be a fun but strange weekend for her cause on Sunday shes not going to be here any more, not too sure what I'm going to do, mom and I have talked about this for weeks but still she's moving away I'm not going to see her every day this makes me really sad, but mom says it will work out and not to worried but I do!

Oh Well !!!

Ok mom keeps telling me that my g/f sophie is moving away,but she is here every morning, think mom is having some brain problems but then it hit me last night when we went over there to go for our nightly walk in the freezing cold (still have very little hair on my tummy where they shaved me so its COLD BIG TIME) I would BOL but its not funny... and when we got there the only thing left was the things we get on to sleep and lay on.
Mom was right they are moving what am I going to do with out my g/f here with me everyday? I told aunt sheila that she is breaking up sophie and me and that neither one of us were happy about it ,so they had to stay and bring everything back here! when we got home mom told me that sophie would be spending the weekends with us and they would come over a lot to see us and we would go over there so we'll see what happens but I'm not happy with it!!!!!! 8o(

Mom say's

Mom says she knows that I'm dying and the only thing is she doesn't know that I know also, Mom is putting up a brave front but I know this tearing her apart and there is nothing I can do, and the worst is that my g/f sophie is moving away from here and she won't be here every day which tears me up but I am not letting mom know she has enough on her hands, but the first day sophie is not here is going to be the hardest for me and mom, hate this and so does mom