September 14th 2006 11:14 am
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Zackary never really was much of a swimmer, to him swimming was just walking around in the water! But one day when he was younger, he looked out into the pond and saw a bunch of ducks. He decided to go see what they were, and off he went swimming out into the middle of the pond! When he got near the ducks, they would just fly a little farther away and land in the water again, keeping Zackary chasing them! He wouldn't come back to us as we were calling him, so my dad had to go out in a boat and get him! I was afraid that Zackary was going to sink in the water and drown! He got rescued safely and was one pooped out pup from all that swimming! It was scary at first, but now when I remember that day I laugh! Silly Pup!
July 23rd 2006 7:12 pm
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Hey Pup! I hope you are having so much fun with your old and new friends at the Bridge. While here I am, having not so much fun at all. The house just seems so empty without the yellow walrus in the middle of the floor! You will have to teach all your friends up there how to do the walrus too! I washed your dinny and watey bowls yesterday at your dinny time. I scrubbed them nice and clean, and your placemat too. Then I picked up your blankie and gave it a big hug, folded it in half and put it back in your corner of the room and put your bowls on it. I just don't know what to do with your stuff! And I finally cleaned my room today! I know you would always like it a little messy so you could sleep on my clothes! And I gathered up your toys and put them in your toy box, along with your bandanas. It was so sad to put all that stuff in your box and close the lid, because it was always open for you to root around in. It always seemed like you had to dump all of your toys out to find a certain one. Remember a long time ago I tried to teach you the names of your toys and how to put them away? I wish I would have kept up with that for more than 1 day (hehe) because I know you would have got the hang of it in no time! Boy oh boy, I miss you so much! It was especially hard for me to go to work yesterday morning. It was the first time I had to go by myself, I felt so lonely! I got your clay paw print back from work, oh how I miss those little fuzzy feet! Even though sometimes they could be stinky! And I found a clump of your fur on the floor at work too, I put it in the bag with your paw print. Remember that noisy beagle at work I was always yelling at to shut up? Of course he was being annoying again yesterday morning, but then he started barking while he had his head down on the blanket. I stopped what I was doing and listened, he sounded JUST like you when you would bark! And for some reason I had this crazy idea that it was you, so I ran over to his cage and looked in. But it was just him laying there, sounding just like you. It was like you were talking to me through him or something. I know that is quite silly but it was just so wierd! After a while of being at work I just couldn't bear being there without you anymore so I had to leave early. Leaving work alone was so sad too, I missed having to tell you to "wait" while I opened the doors or telling you to "go down" the stairs. Jeez, just the littlest things I see every day remind me of you! Like sitting outside on the front steps today, I was thinking of how I used to take you out there to cut your nails. It was much better to do it outside because your nails would fly all over the house if I did them inside! And I was thinking about when I would trim the fur between the pads of your paws in the summertime! And when I would brush you outside and get clumps of your fur all over the yard, and the birds would come pick it up for their nests! I am feeling a little better today. I am getting all of these nice messages from our pals on Dogster, and did you see how many rosettes you have on your page now? As you can see, everyone could see what a special pup you are! And one of your pals who looks just like you, Archie, even started a stroll for you, Pup! He got some other doggies to tag their pictures LoveforZackary so we can take a stroll of pictures for you! I gotta admit, Archie does a perfect Zackary Walrus! It makes me laugh every time I see it! And your pal Snoopy made that picture up on the top of your page. I also made it the background on the computer. The Fun Loving Five also made some pictures too! One of them even has you sitting right there with them! All this Dogster love I have been getting has helped me so much! And without this diary to write in, who knows what I would be doing right now! Well Zackary, I just wanted to tell you about my first couple of days without you, they have not been very fun at all. I think the only time I have been laughing or smiling is when I am on Dogster! And of course I had to laugh when I listened to that little movie I made on my phone a few weeks ago of you snoring! And the one of you bouncing around all excited to be going to work! I will have to get them onto the computer to share with your pals. I think I am going to try to get some sleep, and imagine you sitting next to my bed with your head resting on it. Night night Zackary, I love ya!
July 22nd 2006 8:44 am
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Well, this is it. I am having the hardest time of my life right now, I had Zackary get put to sleep Friday morning. He had a bad seizure in the middle of the night while I was trying to fall asleep. I jumped off the bed and just sat there and hugged him and tried to tell him that everything would be okay. It was the worst seizure I ever saw him have, and it was killing me. I gave him one of his pills to help stop the seizure, and he started panting like he was coming out of it, but he was still stiff and his eyes were moving back and forth really fast, something I had never seen happen to him before. It was such a hard thing to see, I felt so helpless and scared that he wouldn't come out of it. When he started coming out of the seizure, I went and got some ice out of the freezer and put it in little bags, put a towel around them and put them on Zackary to help cool him down. I turned the air conditioner on for him too, because I was afraid of him getting a high fever again like he did earlier in the week. I put my blanket and some pillows on the floor next to Zackary and layed there with him the rest of the night, or morning, since it was probably 2 in the morning by then. I couldn't stop staring at the clock and crying, because I had to go to work in a few hours. Zackary always loved to go to work with me, he would always get excited when I asked him if he wanted to go. He could always tell when I was putting my work clothes on. He would follow me around, leaving his wet nose marks on my legs when he bumped into me. I think I might have gotten 20 minutes of sleep, or even less, when my alarm clock went off. This set me off crying again, because I had such a bad feeling that this would be Zackary's last time coming to work with me. I slowly got dressed and ready to go. I grabbed some paper to write my dad a note telling him about Zackary and that he should come to my work and see him or call me. It must have taken me 5 minutes to write the note, I just couldn't stop crying about it. Zackary looked so comfy sleeping on the floor with his head on my blanket that it made it twice as hard to think about him. I wanted him to get up and go outside to go pee before we left, just like he always would. Sometimes I think he would pretend to go to the bathroom so that he would get a cookie and then be on his way to work! I woke Zackary up from snoozing, and tearfully told him that we were going to work. I had his leash and medicine all ready to go, and then I realized he was having a hard time getting up. Of course this got me more upset again. Sometimes he would have a hard time getting up because of the medicine that he was on, but this time he seemed like he wasn't trying as hard. I had my boyfriend help me get Zackary on his feet, but he just kept wobbling and couldn't keep himself up. I put his leash under his belly like a sling to hold him up with, and we helped him get outside. We walked him out into the grass so that he could go pee. I kept thinking to myself that this is the last time he is going to be in the yard, what am I going to do without him. We had to pretty much pick him up to put him in the truck. I told my boyfriend to say his last goodbyes to our Zackary just in case he doesn't get to come home with me. It was such a hard thing to see, and we both hugged Zackary and cried. I was supposed to already be at work by that time, but it was just too hard to leave the house with the horrible feeling that when I come home, I will be coming home without him. I kept talking to Zackary and crying the whole way to work. I didn't want his last time at home or going for a ride to be so sad. I pretty much had to hold Zackary up with his leash and a towel under him to walk him into work. He had such a hard time keeping his feet on the floor without slipping. I finally got him into the kennel, where his blanket and water were still all set up from the night before. I was supposed to be working, but I kept going into Zackary's cage and just sitting with him and crying. I called some people and told them to come say their goodbyes to Zackary. We all sat there with Zackary, telling silly stories of things that he used to do and giving him pieces of bacon. I had brought the rest of his bag of Beggin' Strips from home and his pig ear to give to him at work, they were two of his favorite things! We gave him pieces of a chocolate chip cookie too! We had him "tell me" what he wanted, and had him say biscuit. His tail was wagging, something I hadn't seen all day. When the time finally came, that was when I realized that it was really happening, that this was it. It was the worst feeling I have ever had. Me and my mom layed down with Zackary as he took his last couple of breaths. I felt like a big part of me had just died with him. Zackary had been my best friend for about 10 years, and it all just came to an end. I am happy that he got to spend the last couple hours of his life with me, my mom, 2 of my aunts and my cousin. Zackary loved us all very much, and we loved him too. I am also happy that he got to be at a place he loved to go. My Zackary will be missed by so many people, he was loved by so many. There was something special about him, that made everyone that met him fall in love with him. He was the sweetest dog you could ever meet, he would never hurt anything. He had such a great personality and was such a brave boy for being as happy as he was after he went blind. I am still going to write in Zackary's diary, sometimes to say hi to him and tell him how much I miss him, and that I am always thinking about him. But mostly I am going to write about all of the memories I have of him, all the happy times and even some of the sad ones. I am even starting to feel a little better already, now that I am typing this all out. It's like I am talking to him.
RIP my dear Zackary, I love you and miss you so much. This has been the hardest time of my life. I hope you are happy now. I hope you are able to see again, and are even reunited with my Puffalump you stole from me a long time ago! You were such a funny dog, you always made me laugh. I will miss the fun we had together every day, but I will always have the wonderful memories of you, my Pup. Cookies 'n Bacon my buddy, I love you.