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I am another one used and abused

Yoga 101

March 1st 2007 8:58 pm
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Yoga 101 fer doggies who like to hep our moms get in shape.
First as yer mom descends into what the hoomans call dogward facing doggy you positshun yerself between the arms and legs of yer mom so when her head is facing down, she can eye you upside down as you proceed to bark furiously and do the bobble head (Puggies you know what I am talkin about) this heps her consentrate wif strength......
Then you encourage yer cousin to sneak up while yer mom is in the straight legged, head down posishun and stick her nose in between yer moms legs and and gives her little licks on the mouth and eyes while yer moms face is at our level...I encourage this as it helps them concentrate on their deep breathing ...
Then as yer mom stands in the proud warrior posishun, you runs up and licks and bites her toes....this heps wif her balance.....
Then you and yer cousin regroup and runs around yer mom in circles growlin and doin the bobble head jumping over her outstretched leg or try to jump (If you have short legs you can run unner neath this leg) as she is in the triangle posishun...this helps wif her balance and strength while concentrating on her deep breathing...
Last but not least...the floor exeycises....While yer mom is on the floor in the cobra posishun wif her head and chest up, arms outstretched and palms facing up , you walks around to her face and gives her poopy breath kissys...this encourages her to lift up even higher and heps wif the strengthening of her back and stomach muscles...
then you walks over to yer toy...this can be any toy wet, slobbery, stinky...just make sure its pretty yucky, pick it up and go deposit in one of her upward facing palms, then go get another yucky toy and do the same thing wif the other hand....this heps strengthen yer moms gag reflexes.
Do this while yer cousin stands over yer moms feets and proceeds to lick them then yer mom has had all the help she wants and proceeds to crumble into a nonstrengthing, nonbalancing, nondeep breathing mess....
Yer job is curl up in a comfy position and goes to sleep....
Works everytime.......

*Nama Stay*


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