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The Biscuit Diaries

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DAY 187, Tuesday, 9/11/12

September 12th 2012 7:46 am
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Guess what they’ve got in New Jersey: Rabbits! Yeah, Aunt Ro has them in her backyard.

I really like Aunt Ro. When we sit and watch TV at home, I usually curl up by Bob, but last night, I sat by Aunt Ro. Then, when it came time to go to bed, everybody went upstairs but me. I stayed downstairs until I got tired of being alone, but when I went upstairs and found Bob’s door closed, I went into Aunt Ro’s room and spent the night with her.

I like grandma Carol too. She’s really nice.


DAY 186, Monday, 9/10/12

September 11th 2012 7:59 am
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Jimminy Cricket! I can’t remember when I’ve had so much excitement. Bob and I spent the night at the Harrisburg Hilton, and the people there were so nice. They all even knew that they weren’t supposed to pet me with my vest on, though they all wanted to.

This morning, we took the train from Harrisburg to Philadelphia and then to Wilmington. The people at Amtrak were also very nice, and everybody in the train stations and those on the trains wanted to pet me too. I liked the train because they seated us up front where I had lots of room to spread out.

A nice man named Chuck met us at the train station in Wilmington and drove us to Bridgeton, NJ. That’s where Tony’s sister Ro and their mom live. I fell in love with them right away and they with me. They were surprised that I even got along with their cats.


DAY 184, Saturday, 9/8/12

September 8th 2012 4:09 pm
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Bob and I stopped for the night in Chambersburg, PA. We’ve been on the road for four days now, and we’ve gone to a whole bunch of different restaurants. With my Service Dog vest, I haven’t had the slightest problem getting into any of the restaurants—though some of the managers looked like they weren’t too thrilled about letting Bob in.

We’ve also stayed in several motels, generally without any problems. However, last night at a Motel 6 in Bristol, VA, the night clerk asked Bob if he had any pets. He replied, correctly, “No, but I have a service dog with me.” The clerk scoffed, “That’s a pet.” “No,” Bob corrected him, “He’s a service dog, not a pet.” The clerk mumbled something else about charging a pet fee, so Bob and I just went somewhere else. Once we got checked in, though, Bob sent an E-mail to the parent company of Motel 6, Accor Hotels, demanding an apology. Under the Americans with Disabilities Act, hotels and motels cannot refuse service to people with service animals, and they can’t charge any additional fees for service animals. You know what’s really funny? It seems that I have more training than that clerk had.


DAY 183, Friday, 9/7/12

September 7th 2012 5:56 pm
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Ninety-nine boxes of treats on the wall,
ninety-nine boxes of treats:
take one down, pass it around,
ninety-eight boxes of….

What? You don’t like my singing? Well try being cooped up in a truck cab for a four-day trip across the country with Bob, who mangles every note on the musical scale…and then some.

When I went outside this morning for my first walk, I thought it had snowed in Tennessee. Turns out, it was just my fur from the brushing Bob had given me the night before. We made it all the way across Tennessee today and just over into Virginia. Tomorrow night, we’ll probably hit Hagerstown, MD, Bob says.


DAY 182, Thursday, 9/6/12

September 6th 2012 4:42 pm
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Wow! Dogster Diary Pic of the Day again! What’s this, the sixth time? But who’s counting, eh?

We made it all the way to Jackson, Tennessee, tonight. I could have gone farther, but I guess Bob was tired from all that driving. Being cooped up in the truck is kinda getting to me too, actually. I’ll be glad when we get somewhere that I can run and play.

I gave Bob a break, though. I’ve started jumping up into the cab all by myself. Truth is, I didn’t really enjoy having Bob lift me. I was afraid he would drop me.


DAY 181, Wednesday, 9/5/12

September 6th 2012 4:36 pm
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I'm so excited and I just can't hide it
I'm about to lose control and I think I like it
I'm so excited and I just can't hide it
[Rim shot]

Bob and I started out on our cross-country trip today. He’s driving a 22-foot truck with Victor’s and his parents’ things in it. At first, I wasn’t sure about the truck because the cab is so high, and Bob has had to lift me up into it. It does have a nice, wide bench seat, though, and I get to look out all the big front and side windows.

Along the way, we stopped at a Taco Bell so Bob could get something to eat. He used to love Taco Bell, but now he says it’s just not the same since Tony has taught him what food is supposed to taste like. I guess when you’re on the road, though, you take what you can get. So, anyway, we were in the restaurant, and Bob got up to get a packet of sweetener for his tea. He told me to stay, and you know what? I didn’t budge an inch. Of course, that’s what a service dog is supposed to do. We should follow the humans’ commands because doing that reinforces their delusion that they’re superior to us Canines.

Today, we got all the way to Texarkana, TX, and tomorrow we should be somewhere in Tennessee.


DAY 179, Monday, 9/3/12

September 4th 2012 4:24 am
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Yesterday, Tony said I stank like a dog. (He forgets that I’m the one with the super-strong sense of smell.) So, he had Bob spray me with some girlie stuff. Yuck. Then, this morning, after he took me to the courts to run, he brushed me really well. I hope the brushing got rid of all that perfume.

Remember my friend Mary Ann, the one whose birthday party Tony and Bob went to last week in Arizona? Well, during the party, someone left a door open, and Trixy, Mary Ann’s cat, ran away. We’ve all been so worried about her. Then, this morning, we got an E-mail from Mary Ann saying that a neighbor had found Trixy and that Mary Ann and Art had brought her home. I’m so happy for them. I don’t know what I’d do if Tony or Bob got lost and couldn’t find his way back home.


DAY 178, Sunday, 9/2/12

September 3rd 2012 4:48 am
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First, I want to thank all my pals for all the birthday wishes yesterday. You’re all grrrrreat!

Bob took me to the tennis courts this morning to get some exercise, and when we got back to the apartment, Tony had filled my water bowl with some nice cold water from the refrigerator. Wasn’t that nice of him? Thank you, Tony.


DAY 177, Saturday, 9/1/12

September 1st 2012 3:10 pm
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Happy birthday to me,
Happy birthday to me,
Happy birthday, dear Biscuit.
Happy birthday….

Oh, no, since I’m adopted, we really don’t know when my birthday is, but Bob and Tony chose this date for the records. So, today I’m officially two. I’m supposed to be an adult now, but I still like to act like a teenager now and then. I think I deserve a giant birthday cake, but since my tummy is just now getting back to normal after having been “abandoned” for five days, I guess I’d better stick to my regular food.


DAY 174, Wednesday, 8/29/12

August 30th 2012 8:04 am
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The nice folks at the boarding place gave me a good bath just before Bob picked me up yesterday, but they didn’t brush me. Consequently, I had almost a week’s worth of extra fur. When Bob brushed me this morning, he said that it looked like the gerbil circus had come to town. (See Day 24.)

I got to go to the mall today, and…well…maybe I’d better back up and tell you the whole story.

Ya see, I’ve been kinda upset ‘cuz I thought Bob and Tony had abandoned me while they went to Arizona. In fact, I was so stressed out that I had an upset tummy and had diarrhea all day yesterday. Early this morning, I tried to wake the guys to let them know that I needed to go out, but it was too late, and I ended up making a mess on the living room floor. So, Bob went to the store and rented one of those carpet cleaning machines.

While the floor was drying, we decided to get some lunch and cruise the mall. Bob said I did great. At first, I pulled a little too much at the leash, but once I got the hang of it, I kept a nice, comfortable pace, and I didn’t let anybody or anything distract me. Bob said it was good practice for our trip back East. Oh, and that’s another thing….

I was upset with Bob because he promised to take me on a trip in the big truck, the train, and the airplane. When he and Tony went off to Arizona, I thought that Bob had reneged on his promise. It turns out that they are two separate trips. The trip back East doesn’t start until next week. The whole thing was a big misunderstanding.

I think Bob might need to work on his communication skills. I mean, I know he got a degree in communication, but Jeepers, that was in the last millennium—long before I was even born. Maybe he needs a refresher course.

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