March 27th 2013 9:25 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 4 people already have ]
I got your message loud and clear today. I have been second-guessing my decision and feeling terribly guilty after losing you. And your disease is uncommon and difficult to diagnose. But, today at work, one of the doctors had a medical book in my work area, and left it open to attend to other matters. Usually, I keep the books open or mark the page so they can come back to it. I walked over to the book and it read "treating glomerulunephritis". My heart sank. I read it. It talked of different options, all of them with unsuccessful or undetermined outcomes. The disease is rapidly progressive. I felt a kind of weight lift off my shoulders. It was as if you were saying, "See Mom, there is nothing you could've done. Stop feeling responsible and guilty." I believe things happen for a reason, things are placed in our path to show us things. And, I believe that today you showed me something, Zane. I am still enormously filled with grief at losing you, but I see that nothing would've changed the outcome. I did what was best for you, my friend. I didn't want you to suffer. Thank you for sending me that message. Thank you for sharing a piece of your life with me. I miss you, my dear sweet beloved Zane.
Love with all my heart,
Leave A Comment | 4 people already have
they do show us signs. sometimes our hearts are so filled with grief that we don't see them, i'm glad you saw this one.
much love, lori
If this was not a sign, Mom and I don't know what is. Reading this gave Mom goosebumps. We thank you and your Mom for your recent comment on my diary entry.
I am so glad precious Zane sent you this sign. Hopefully you will find more peace now!
So very glad Zane sent you a sign. He worries about you always and is watching!