May 6th 2013 7:57 am
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April 28, 2013 – I had a real bad night again. Now Mommy just cries and cries. She still soaks my foot but it is even bigger now. It hurts when she massages it and I squirm to get away. I still have the strength to try and get away and I still give her a good fight, too. I have not given up yet and still feisty as ever. I slept a lot of the day and when daddy comes home he bring me outside and makes me walk. He sees my left foot is curling under and tell mommy. She is more upset now. She knows it is a bad sign and I am getting worst. She knows daddy is still in denial and wants me to stay around a little longer but mommy’s trying to come to terms with all of this. We have been best friends for almost 15 years and always have been there for each other. I remember a time long ago her mother was really sick and I did not see much of mommy for a while and one day she came home and lay on the bed. She put me on the foot of the bed which is not normal. Me on the bed? She was crying and she said Timber I wish you give me a kiss. I got right up and came over to her face and started kissing her and lay down so close to her and she stopped crying and we fell asleep together. We have always been there for each other.
My time is near the end. They both do not want to give up on me but mommy knows it is time but daddy does not want to call the vet back, yet. Mommy walked me in the afternoon and I start pulling to my left and walking in a circle. Bad, bad sign and mommy knows it. She cries and holds me and tells me she loves me. She tells me soon all will be OK and all the pain will go away. She is praying I just pass in my sleep but it looks like that is not going to happen. Daddy says wait one more day and maybe I will get better. Mommy says I am getting worst and does not want me to suffer. He says just one more day. So mommy did not call the vet knowing maybe she should have because, she night I am worst at night and was going to be a long night. Daddy promised to help bring me out in the middle of the night to go peepee.
Mommy and daddy sat down for dinner and forgot about me in the living room. I can’t walk and they are eating without me. So I start to cry and wining. Daddy came out and says Timber wants to be with us. So he picks up the bed with me on it and drags me in to the dining room and put me next to mommy. Now I can see what they are eating and beg for some of their food. Mommy saved me some of her chicken and pasta and I eat it like jaws. I still like to eat.
Tonight mommy gave me 3 ½ Tramadol and Rescue remedy to help me relax. Daddy put me in my doggie cave with the bed I like and kissed me good-night. I fell asleep right away. I was really tired. Going outside to do my business took a lot out of me. Mommy came in and was going to give me my good-night cookies but I was asleep. That did not last long. An hour later I was restless and running in place over and over again. Mommy gave me water and usually that help me go back to sleep but not
tonight. She try food and more rescue remedy but no I just want to get up and walk around. I am very restless and nothing is helping me calm down. I frustrated I cannot get up and walk around and start to cry. Mommy wakes daddy and he bring me outside to do peepee and bring me to the living room this time. Mommy gives me more water and holds me tightly. She tells me she loves me and is glad I am still with her. I fall asleep for two hours but back to running in place and wanting to get up. Mommy tries water and food this time but no go. I am inconsolable. Finally, I settle down and sleep anther two hours and now I wake up worst than ever. Cannot stop running in place and trying to get up. She tries wrapping my head with at scarf for pressure on my head and moving me. She gets me up and all I do is spin the top of my torso in a circle to my left. Now mommy real upset. This is really not good. I keep working myself up and wining. She cannot find any way to calm me down for three hours and then she places her hand on the top of my head and applies pressure. Oh that feels good and I calm down but as soon as she lets go I start running again.
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