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Sedona Says.........


April 17th 2012 1:52 pm
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My BF "Vernie" and I cweated a pwlay adaptayshuwn foh Da Wittowl Wed Skool Haus' wendishuwn of "Da 12 Days of Cwistmas". It was a wundowefuwl and FUN success (and CWAZIE! humpf!), and we have AWL owowe cwassmates to thank foh deowe mastuwefuwl acting and singing abiwitees and hawd hawd wowk. :) Below, is my accounting of what happened on owowe Opening Day. BOL


Da Pwlay:

“Da 12 Days of Cwistmas Foo-Foos” -- A Cwistmas Cawwowle Spectaculowe
by Sedona
(all photos courtesy of awr gweat Pawtogwaphowe…Vernie’s Momma! – Tank yew!!)

Bailey has asked me if I wud wite an awticowle bout da Cwistmas Speshuwl I diwwected at Skool. ***In the background, Sedona can hear her Momma loudly warning her not to be critical of her little Fur Friends when describing the events that took place leading up to, and on the day of, the Xmas Special performance. Afterall, they all did their very best, and that is what should count!***

Not be cwiticawl? Is she kidding? Weewee? How am I posed to wite a factual awticowl if my paws awr tied? Humpf! I guess my Momma spects me to wite a Faiwee Tale! Fine! Humpf!

“Once upon a time”, at da Wittowl Wed Skool Haus, deowe was a sweet wittowl Shih Tzu subteetoot teachowe named Sedona, who had a cwass fuwl of good, obedient, smawt, wubbwee dwaaaaamah stoodints, who pawfowmed in da Cwistmas Speshuwl exactwee as dey weowe diwwected to do……….NOT! NOT NOT NOT, Momma! Humpf! I not gonna candy coat da twuth, missy! Humpf!
And thus begins my woefuwl tale of….


Da 12 Days of Cwistmas Foo-Foos--

It awl stawted out as a gweat idea. See? I was famous now, aftoe my gweat awticowl foh STaFU , “Da Awt of da Foo-Foo”, orh so dat wiley wittowl Bailey said. She filled my head wif BIG ideas of being wich and famus! weast dat’s wat I got out of it. Humpf! I dweamed of my name in BIG BWITE WITES! Nuffing cud stop me. So, I decided to stawr in my vewwee own Cwistmas moovie! Unfowtunatewwee, we wan out of time foh pwoductshun by da howwidays, so I entowed us in a Cwistmas Cawwole Singing Speshuwl, instead. Seemed weewee easy at dat time: Just pick a Cwistmas song to sing, and sing it wif GWEAT dwamatic pwesense! Easy, wite? …..HUMPF!

Being da sweet, kind, innocent, wubbwee wittowl Shih Tzu dat I am, I decided to wet my cwass shaowe in da Woad to Fame, foh yew see, I am da SubTeeToot Teachowe foh Miss Cwissy, at da Wittowl Wed Skool Haus at Miss Dixie Monroe’s DixieWande!

I picked da pawfect song foh us to sing: “Da 12 Days of Cwistmas”, cuz it is one of my momma’s fabowite Cwistmas Cawowles. But nevowe wanting to get wost in da cwowd, I decided to make da song “my own”, just wike dey say to do on Amewican Idowle! I aptwee named my song “Da 12 Days of Cwistmas Foo-Foos”.

I asked each Fuw to sign up next to Days 3-12 (cuz I pwee-picked da Fuws foh Days 1 & 2). And I gabe dem da lywwiks foh da weefwain:
“On da _____ day of Cwistmas, Sedona gabe to meeeeeeeee…..”
Awl dey den had to do, was pick da lywwicks foh da next pawt. Da lywwicks had to descwibe something dat had to do wif Foo-Foos! EASY! Wite? …NO! humpf!

Getting 12 wittowl deewinquents, uhm, I mean “stoodints” to wisten to dwama diwectshuwn is a pwitty impossibowl feat, as I was soon to luhwn.

*rolls her big eyeballs, and then snorts out a little snotty bubble out of her little nose* Wots of da Fuws twied to get out of picking a Foo-Foo tweatment. Dey cheatowes. Humpf! Bailey was da wowst. She picked “4 Diamond Collowes”! How is dat a Foo-Foo “tweatment”? I hab been wanting to Foo-Foo dat pawfectwee fwuffy, pwitty snow white pup foh a wong wong time now, and she steel managed to get out of it! Technicawee, yew see, pup collowes AWR gibben as pawt of da Foo-Foo wahdwobe, so I cuddent say dat she cuddent pick doze lywwicks. Bailey is toooooo much of a smawty pants, and soon to be a big lawyowe. *rolls eyeballs*

Our big day was to take pwace at da Metwopowitan Opewa House in NYC, on Dec 23. We had been pwactising awl monf foh dis day, and weowl….we weewee needed at weast one whole yeowe to pwactice, not just one monf! Humpf! Becuz dis Speshuwl ony wasting a few hours (NOT a few days!), I decided dat we bettowe just pawfowm da WAST vewse of da song, beginning wif Day 12 – and wowking down to Day 1. ONY Day 12 wud need to sing bofe da weefwain and deowe lywwiks. Ebweebodies ewlse ony had to sing just deowe lywwicks – and to sing wif BIG DWAAAAMAHHH! (NO weefwains foh days 11-1). Seems eazee….. wite?! Humpf!

Da BIG Day—
Wen we awwibed at da Metwopowitan Opewa, AWL da Fuws wew wunning awound scweaming and getting nehvus, and Bailey was asking foh twanquilizowes! And den she gwabbed a bag and stawted to hypoweventiwate! Den, normally good Bailey who now is Cwazee Bailey, decides she has to go potty ebwee second, wite befowe we go on stage! HUMPF! Den (as if deowe not enuff “dens”!)….we made da mistake of wooking undowe da cuwtain wite befowe we wew to go on stage…OMD!


Showtly deoweaftowe, Momo (Day 6 )….faints! Den, Patwick AND Caspowe, Days 1 & 2, confused and dazed wif stage fwight, stawt singing deowe pawts backstage!!! – tinking dey alweady ON stage! OH BWUDDOWE!

Weowl, we got on stage and weowl…I hab NO wowds to descwibe wat happened, cept to say dat if yew wook up da phwaze “WUNNING AMMUCK” in da dixshuwnaywee, yew gonna see a BIG pic of my Cwass! Humpf!

So, wiffout fuddowe addooooooo, I now gib yew a view at awr pawfowmance ….in da owdowe in wich deeze wittowl cwiminawls, uhm, I mean, “stoodints” pawfowmed da song… oddowe wowds, in da WONG OWDOWE! Humpf! Yew can wead da twanscwipt of da pawfowmance at da Skool, beginning on page 1197 – if yew bwave enuff! BOL!

And now foh yew viewing pweashuwe….humpf!

Da Pawfomance:

I walked up to da Conductowe’s podium, scissowes in hand, weady to lead my Dwaamah Cwass to Fame & Fowtune, ohw at weast to just get us thwew dis Speshuwl:

Sedona is da conductor for our Kissmiss special

(wait for animation to woad, pwease!)

I was post to stawted off da pawfowmance by singing a wuvwee poem dat my boyfwend (and Sistant) “Vernie”, wote foh me, BUT pushy wittowl cutie pie Goodie-Goodie Two Shoes “I Now WUV Da Stage” Patwick…who nevowe wants to make any mistakes, decides he needs to sing his pawt again…. NOW….ON STAGE….befowe I eben get my song out! HUMPF! I tink I hab cweated a stage hog in da wittowl Scottish Highwand Tewwiowe…! Notice da cuwlowes in Patwick’s haeowe? Weowl, dat happened cuz I dint hab time to finish his wawdwobe due to awl da cwaziness backstage.

On Da Fuwst Day of Cwistmas

I just stood deowe dumbfounded, yet twying to wook wike ebweeting’s just peachy. HUMPF! And den…aftowe Patwick, “Mr I dunt wanna be weft out of dis Speshuwl, derefowe I’ll just sing MY pawt whenebbowe I feeowl wike it” was finished wif Day 1’s pawt, I pwoceeded to sing MY song. Unfowtoonatewee, nobodies in da audience paid tenshuwn to it due to da chaos on da stage! OMD! Humpf!


I, as da conductowe, steel pweetended as best I cud, dat ebweeting was just going fine and in da owdowe it was post to be in. Scissowes in my wittowl paws…twying to fight da uwge to STWIKE one of my stoodints, I twied to ignowe da fact dat NO BODIES in my Cwass knows how to count! NO BODIES wew singing deowe pawt! Ebweebodies was just in a wine, standing deowe wif deowe paws ovowe deowe mouths…shivvowing! Dat is cept foh Bailey, who was wowweed dat her mascawa was wunning! OMD..humpf! It was just ….unbeeweevabowl.! Fuws wew talking to each oddowe duwing da pawfowmance!. *gulp* And, ebweebodies (incwuding Fuw famiwee membowes) wew saying “Hi!” to one anuddowe on stage!. *gulp* Den…Loki stawted walking awound nekkid! He was posed to weowe a bathing suit foh his pawt, but I dunt know wat happened! Den…Lulu (Day 7) BLUWTS out, wanting to know IF it’s heh tuwn yet. NO LULU…we haben’t got past Day 1, yet! Humpf! *grumble grumble* Meanwhile, Bogie stawts cwapping aftowe I finish singing my song…but….ony da audience posed to cwap…NOT da Actowes! Den, Vernie tewls me to sing my song…again, so dat ebweebodies who missed it, can see it. OMD! Den, Loki stawts passing awound some beef jewkey to Bambi, and Hawley stawts fliwting wif Bailey! ??? Den Caspowe FWIES up ovowe da stage, and stawts spwinkling Angeowl Dust ovowe ebweebodies in da audience. DEN….Vernie tewls wittowl Stage Hogwett Patwick, to go and sing his pawt…AGAIN, whiole doing an Iwish Jig! OMD! Is dis a dweam?

Finawee. An howowe waytowe, Caspowe (Day 2) goes up and sings his pawt! ONE HOWOWE WAYTOWE! Humpf!

On Da 2nd Day of Cwistmas

Hey?! Anybodies noticing dat we posed to hab sang da WAST vewse of da song, beginning wif Day 12 (Vernie!)….and ending wif Day 1 (Patwick!), but dat instead we doing it AWL backwawds? !!

And so on and on and on it went. Patwick kept singing his pawt ovowe and ovowe, and Bailey was getting a wittowl bit jealous, BOL! And den Bambi stawted kissing one of da Fuws – I can’t weemembowe whom. And …ebweebodies just stawted doing deowe own ting!! ….And deowe I stood…in shock….just moofing my wittowl sheeowes back and fowth, pweetending to be conducting dis cwazey gwoup of stoodints…. ebweebodies was singing out of tuwn and wunning about wike wittowl chickens wif deowe heads cut off, whiole on stage! OMD. At one point, Hawley, seeing how cwazey tings weowe going wif da song, stawted to DANCE foh no weason…tinking dat he cud cweate a divushuwn foh da audience! OMD…humpf! Tanks a wot, Hawley! *Sedona throws her paws up in the air, in exhasperation* I beeweeve awr Cwistmas song took bout THWEE howowes to finish! OMD!

Weelibbing da whole expeeweence is a wittowl too much foh me to beowe wite now, so I just gonna post da Pawtogwaphs dat Vernie’s Momma took of awl of us, and I gonna post dem in owdowe dey wew posed to be in -- fwom Day 12 -1; and I NOT incwuding awl da mistakes da Fuws made awong da way. Dat wud take monfs foh me to detaiwl. BOL!

Dis, how” Da 12 Days of Cwistmas Foo-Foos” was posed to hab been sung….

Me, Conducting!
(wait for animation to woad, pwease!)

On da twelfth day….
(wait for animation to woad, pwease!)

My boyfwend and Sistant,Vernie, in WOTS of twubbowls! He dint ebben get da lywwiks wite foh da weefwain! OMD! Humpf! But wook at him ZOOM! BOL!

On da Elebenf Day….

Miss Dixie! OMD! I know she gone thwew a WOT and she a fightowe, but…. She NOT posed to be a Ninja Wawwiowe wif doze sheeowes! BOL!

On Da Tenf Day…

Fank goodness foh puppies! Fwosty did GWEAT! Wook at his cutie pie Foo-Foo’d toes! Awwwwwwww!

On Da Ninef Day…

Oh bwuddowe! Dat cutie pie Bambi bwew most of da pwops wite off da stage wif doze bwowe dwyowes! Humpf!

On Da Eight Day …

hmmmmmm? Hoses foh a Foo-Foo? Maybe dat’s not such a bad idea! BOL!

On Da Sevenf Day…
(wait foh animation, pwease!)

OMD! Dat wittowl cutie pie Lulu is a wiley one, too! She posed to sing “7 soapy sudsings!”….not “siwwee sudsings!”. My sudsings awr not siwwee! Humpf!

On Da Sixf Day…
Ahhhhh, cutie pie Momo! He’s such a good boy pup! He WUV’d his massagee!!! BOL!

On Da Fif Day…..

(wait for animation to woad, pwease!)

Wittowl cutie pie Loki did so good in his pwactices! He always sang wif such DWAAAMMAAAAAH! BOL!

On Da Fourf Day….

HUMPF! Wat happened wif Bailey!?! She usuawee such a good guwl pup, but foh dis Cwistmas Speshuwl, oh bwuddowe! Wat a Miss Painey! She ate and ate and ate doze snackies! I twied to tewl herh to exocize and diet, but she wuddent wisten! So, wen it was time foh da pawfowmance, she cuddent fit into hew 4 Diamond Collowes! She had to cawwee dem in herh paws! Humpf! Serbs herh wite foh getting out of a Foo-Foo Tweatment! BOL! (btw, Miss Lawyowe Smawty Pants is weading a Cwass Actshuwn Suit against “Unwanted Foo-Foos”!, but dats foh anuddowe awticowle! Humpf!

On Da Thiwd Day…

Hawley cutie pie, awong wif Bailey and Patwick, is usuawee such a goodie goodie pup. And tankfuwee, he was steel good in dis Speshuwl (unwike Patwick and Bailey! Humpf!).

On Da Second Day of Cwistmas....

Awwwwwwww, cutie pie pweshus Caspowe! We miss yew so much, but we so gwad he can steel be pawt of awr Cwass! He did a gweat job in dis Cwistmas Speshuwl, ebben if he did insuwt his own songs and lywwicks and music into his pawt duwwing pwactices! BOL! …but in da actual ebbent, he was gwande! Awwwwww!

On Da Fuwst Day of Cwistmas...again and again and again!.

Oh, now isn’t dis speshuwl? Humpf!
Mr wittowl “I tink I’ll just sing my Day 1 pawt anytime I want to, which is befowe and aftowe ebweebodies ewlse’s pawt!!”…. HUMPF!
I dunt know wat got into “usuawee GOODIE goodie boy Patwick”, but I tink he tinks da numboweing system goes wike dis: 1, 2, 1, 3, 1, 4, 1, 5, 1, 6, 1…..1, 1. 1, 1! Humpf! I tink da stage got to his wittowl white fluffy pawfect cutie pie head! BOL! *snorts out a little bubble out of her little nose* I tink I gonna hab to teach weemeediawl wifmatic dis yeowe in skool!

At weast ebweebodies DID get deowe spewling and dictshuwn cowwectwee! I dunt tink I huwd any of doze stwange “R” and “r” wettowes….but dat ony cuz I thweatened dem AWL wif a BIG FOO FOO if dey used dem!

So, deowe yew hab it! Dis one Cwistmas Speshuwl dat will wiv in infamy!
I dunt tink we gonna win any Cademee Wawds foh dis one, unwess it’s foh Best Comedy! Humpf! But wike Momma said…I guess awl dat mattowes is dat we had FUN…and dat, we did!

Happy New Yeowes, Ebweebodies!

Barked by: JAKIE, FOREVER LOVED (Dogster Member)

April 18th 2012 at 6:17 pm

WOW!!!! You and Vernie did a fantastic 12 Days of Xmas!!!!!!
Barked by: JAKIE, FOREVER LOVED (Dogster Member)

April 18th 2012 at 6:27 pm

WOW!!!! You and Vernie did a fantastic 12 Days of Xmas!!!!!!




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