<?xml version="1.0"?><!-- generator=" Dogster feed generator/0.1 " -->
<rss version="2.0" xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/">
<channel>
<title>PuppiPawz</title>
<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz</link>
<description>Dogster diary for the dog Joey</description>
<language>en</language>
<copyright>Copyright 2013 by Joey &amp; Dogster</copyright>
<pubDate>Sun, 19 May 2013 23:54:13 PDT</pubDate>
<generator>Dogster Pet-o-matic Gennie - http://www.dogster.com</generator>
<ttl>360</ttl>

	<item>
		<title>I was tagged by Sully!!!!</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/371849</link>

				<pubdate>Wed, 3 Oct 2007 21:20:38 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/371849</guid>
		<description>I was tagged by my buddy Sully! The rules of the game say I have to list 7 random facts about myself ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I was tagged by my buddy Sully! The rules of the game say I have to list 7 random facts about myself in my diary and tag 7 other pups and list them next. Don't forget to bark them a paw-mail so they know they were tagged and read my diary for the instructions.

1. I am a food enthusiast who wishes Mommy served chicken every night
2. I am not allowed to do anything that derails Mommy's efforts to teach me manners and courtesy toward smaller beings. 
3. I am consumed by an absolute and uncontrollable need to chase ducks whenever they cross my path
4. I have extremely articulate paws. I can grab and hold stuff and play the paw game like nobody's business
5. I have this uncanny ability to wake up exactly 30 minutes before Mommy's alarm clock goes off. I use this time to coax her into consciousness by forcing her to play the above mentioned paw game. Once she gets up I go right back to sleep for 3 hours.
6. I like ice cubes in my water dish
7. I always fall asleep on my stomach or on my side. I usually wake up on my back.

Tag! You're it!!
1. Harley - http://www.dogster.com/dogs/583068
2. Toby - http://www.dogster.com/dogs/262671
3. Harrod - http://www.dogster.com/dogs/146165
4. Goldie - http://www.dogster.com/dogs/261488
5. Taz - http://www.dogster.com/dogs/584563
6. Snowy - http://www.dogster.com/dogs/333387
7. Joey - http://www.dogster.com/dogs/256096

.......-.__.-.
......l /)"(| /
Joey(_o_) Pawz
.......................]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Joey-Aid 2007</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/310866</link>

				<pubdate>Sun, 20 May 2007 20:28:44 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/310866</guid>
		<description>My weekend days are pretty full and exciting. We always go somewhere or have people over who bring t ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ My weekend days are pretty full and exciting. We always go somewhere or have people over who bring their dogs and  I get to socialize quite a bit. It’s only during the week days that I sometimes get a little bored.  

See, my days need purpose and reason. Especially on work days when I am cruelly abandoned and left to my own devices for hours on end........OK, ok, let’s face it……………..Mommy has to keep me in the manner with which I have become accustomed and to do that she must leave me alone Monday thru Friday from 8-5.……………

I understand that and I am lucky because Mommy’s work is 6 minutes away and she comes home for lunch most days to have some quality mid-day Joey time. (I am entertaining like that, you know)  and this is good because it breaks my day up nicely. 

I can only laze around and test cushions and beds and pillows for so long…………eventually I do have to get up and do something productive. 

In an effort to do this I often engage in any method of transference that I can conceive of which works to distract me from being bored. Chasing the cats always works but they aren’t very playful and don’t appreciate the added exercise of avoiding me daily sooooooooooo when that wears thin and the claws come out I switch tactics and attack my toy basket. 

Yes, I do often feel obligated to entertain inanimate household objects. I cannot explain this urge except to say that until a cure can be found I will continue to suffer in occasional silence. 

As an example, today I rescued Mommy’s new purple cross top pedi-friendly fuzzy slipper from a boring day of nothingness. However, Mommy did not see the heroic aspects of this endeavor. She  just saw her purple shoe as a victim. 

(sigh) I can see that we will have to continue to work on our communication. She needs to understand that I am offering a service here and not just randomly slobbering on shoes without reason or purpose. 

Well, there have been some recent developments at Mommy’s work and it looks like they may be relocating the offices  to a place that would make Mommy’s commute about 25 minutes!!! 

No more Mommy and Me times at lunch.  Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr 

To help me adjust to this shocking and distressing development, Mommy has been talking about getting me a new little buddy to hang around with all day while she is gone.  She says she wants to get something called a Yorkie. She gets all mushy when she talks about it until Daddy says if we get a Yorkie he is going to always call him Sergeant and this usually works to distract Mommy from her New Yorkie state of mind.  

I am not sure what it all means except that those cats better step up and make themselves more available for recreation time. I cannot help that I have to chase stuff and the purple slipper doesn’t fling so fast that it offers me any type of  satisfactory chase alternative. 

Anyone wishing to offer sympathy, help and support should please leave a bone or two…………or just come over and let me chase you around my back yard a bit.

Thank you 

.......-.__.-.
......l /)"(| /
Joey(_o_) Pawz
.......................]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Nippers &amp; Yippers</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/241805</link>

				<pubdate>Thu, 7 Dec 2006 14:22:10 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/241805</guid>
		<description>Every once in a while an opportunity comes along for me to make a new friend. I love and cherish my  ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Every once in a while an opportunity comes along for me to make a new friend. I love and cherish my old friends all the same but it is exciting to make new ones too. 

You know, regardless of size and age, deep life-long friendships can be cemented with nothing more than a few cursory wags and some well placed sniffs. 

It needs to be said at this point that personal temperament plays highly here. Apparently you can’t just go around sniffing anyone who comes into your olfactory range. Aside from some embarrassed Mommy looks (the slightly raised eyebrow and giggle are a dead giveaway) there are some Alpha’s who object strongly, and occasionally violently, to this type of behavior. 

Successful meetings of this nature depend greatly on the personalities involved. For example, Alphas and Betas get along well together once the canine hierarchy is settled and when (2) Betas meet & greet each other it gives one Beta the opportunity to seize the day and step up onto the leader’s platform of seniority. This builds morale and canine self-confidence. These meetings are mutually beneficial to all involved. 

On the downside though, Alpha pairings are not so easy. 

I myself am Alpha dog………..in so much as I can be weighing only 17 pounds and being the size of a cat.  Ok, a large housecat but a kitty none-the-less. 

I am extremely Alpha when it comes to roasted chicken. I don’t suppose that helps me when it comes to determining my hierarchy in the presence of a Rottweiler but it can’t hurt to be well fed and a tiny bit spoiled, right?

In the interest of full disclosure I do need to mention that I suffer from a debilitating disability known as short-dog syndrome. 

In another life I am sure I was a wolf. A wild beast with unlimited power. Native creatures probably feared me and avoided my wrath at all costs. 

Not so much in this life though……………. 

The next-door neighbor’s new Chihuahua who is about ¼ my size clearly doesn’t understand that I am boss of him. I have no idea how to go about stressing this fact either when he won’t stop barking and growling and trying to nip me through the fence long enough for me to relay this information.

I have to admit though that I do taunt him to some degree. You would be surprised at how easily a wagging tail and a few gruffy barks can spin that high strung bundle of nerves over the edge into abandoned fury. 

I think its good for him. It wears him out and while he slumbers in his deflated-rage coma I can strut around my back yard in welcomed silence, free to reign supreme……………until he wakes back up and yells at me some more. 

Grrrrrrrrr
,-._,-.
./)"(/
(_o_)
oo--oo]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Joe-Boxers</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/218755</link>

				<pubdate>Thu, 12 Oct 2006 08:52:12 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/218755</guid>
		<description>Here&acirc;s the thing&acirc;&brvbar;&acirc;&brvbar;&acirc;&brvbar;&acirc;&brvbar;I went to my groomer&acirc;s and had a routine spaw day. 

Spaw days gen ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Here’s the thing…………I went to my groomer’s and had a routine spaw day. 

Spaw days generally consist of baths and trims and clippings and doing my nails along with misc. other actions all in a not-so-needed, not so much anyway, effort to make me cuter than I normally am. 

My recent trip there caused some damage though. 

It appears that my groomer got wayyyyyyyyyyy to into her job and shaved/clipped me wayyyyyyyyyyyy too close in my South Pole region.

Everything was chaffed and red and one very sensitive spot was actually cut. Ouchies!

Since it is in a place that I can easily reach, I tried to self-medicate and take care of it on my own with excessive and frequent personal grooming but all I succeeded in doing was aggravating the situation. 

It then became clear to me that Mommy wasn’t going to ignore this no matter how hard I tried to hide it and she insisted that we go see my doctor. 

So off we went……………………when the exam was all said and done, my official prescription turned out to be some ointment and a pair of Joe-Boxers. 
The underwear made it impossible for me to continue to try and self-sooth which is obviously what made it much worse than it would have been. 

Odd prescription, but effective. My new Spiderman Joe-Boxers were put on me upside down so my tail fit through the hole part and the excess material was bunched up with one of mommy’s hair scrunchi’s and then I healed in one day. 

I do just have to say that I kept to myself mostly that day and luckily no one outside saw me in my underwear. I don’t even think Mommy got a picture of it but I might be convinced now to pose for one or two if she lets me be an official Spiderman for Howl-a-ween!!!!

.......-.__.-.
......l /)"(| /
Joey(_o_) Pawz
.......................]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Sometimes Mommy puts stuff in here that I don't always agree with..........</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/203643</link>

				<pubdate>Wed, 6 Sep 2006 20:26:32 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/203643</guid>
		<description>The following is from an email one of her friends sent to her. We don't know where it came from orig ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ The following is from an email one of her friends sent to her. We don't know where it came from originally (or who wrote it) and it has been slightly modified to apply to me......................................................

Dear Joey,
 
The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain
your food.  The other dishes are mine and contain my
food.  Please note, placing your paw in the middle
of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it
becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that
aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The hallway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a
racetrack. Beating me to the end is not the object.
Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed.
I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will
continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your
comfort.  Dogs can actually curl up in a
ball when they sleep.  It is not necessary to sleep
perpendicular to me stretched out to the
fullest extent possible.  I also know that sticking your
tail straight out and having your tongue hanging out
the other end to maximize space is nothing but
sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from
the bathroom.  If by some miracle I beat you there
and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary
to scratch, bark, try to turn the knob or get your
paw under the edge and try to pull the door open.  I
must exit through the same door I entered.  Also, I
have been using the bathroom for years...........canine 
attendance is not mandatory.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell that dog's bottom. 
I cannot stress this enough!


Signed: Your Mommy]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>J-Dawg</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/195281</link>

				<pubdate>Fri, 18 Aug 2006 09:39:35 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/195281</guid>
		<description>My photo was selected to be one of the 200  Dogster dog&acirc;s  pictures to be shown during the end cre ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ My photo was selected to be one of the 200  Dogster dog’s  pictures to be shown during the end credits of Fox’s 2007 Firehouse Dog movie! 

Yay, me!!

This new development has made me wonder if I should put together a resume though………….


.......-.__.-.
......l /)"(| /
Joey(_o_) Pawz
.......................

Name: Joey Pawz
Stage Name: J-Dawg
Age: 2.3 Years 
DOB: 05/15/04 (Taurus)
Gender: M
PawMail: www.dogster.com
ID: 90771

Objective: To Obtain Chicken and Prime Rib……….willing to negotiate

Characteristics:
Strong protective sense of duty
Ability to rise above and overcome Short-Dog Syndrome
Willingness to explore new areas of recreation
Eager recruit of new chasing buddies
Camera Friendly – Cute in Holiday Gear

Skills:
Master of the Shoe Game 
Advanced Duck Playing Experience
High C.A.T. Scores (Chase. Aggravate. Taunt.)
Proven aptitude with repetitive tasks.
Efficient at switching and re-focusing attention span at a moment’s notice. 
Really really really good at chasing stuff


Experience: 2004- Present
Vet visits and surviving the various indignities forced upon me there
Active Duty Back Yard Patrol
Mommy Protector
Sofa sectional, bed and cushion Tester
Food Inspector 
Sanitation Supervisor
Boss of the Cats
Boss of the Ducks
Boss of the Birds
Block Boss
Toy Tester
Car Companion and Trip Navigator
Exemplary Camper
Outdoorsy and Entertaining


References available upon request]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Poorly Placed Garden Gnomes</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/186149</link>

				<pubdate>Fri, 28 Jul 2006 15:19:32 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/186149</guid>
		<description>Joey, mini-guard-dawg extraordinaire, newly assigned protector of garden infiltrators, to the rescue ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Joey, mini-guard-dawg extraordinaire, newly assigned protector of garden infiltrators, to the rescue!

I have taken it upon myself to form a local chapter of the Poorly Placed Garden Gnome Liberation Front. I am uniting all backyard activists and amplifying the call for action against garden gnomes that are positioned in places where my hind leg can’t reach. 

Ok, it has come to light lately that Garden Gnomes are not proper playthings. Just one more thing to add to the list, I know, but there it is.......... so, even though they are Joey-sized and they kind of look like they actually enjoy going for splash-down dips in the pond and being dragged, nipped and grrrrrrrrrr’d at, Mommy doesn’t support these activities and she has been constantly re-positioning them lately. I fear some have even vanished altogether in the mass confusion that these moves have caused. 
 
Now, in an effort to minimize gnome crime and vanquish altogether unauthorized gnome disappearances, it has become necessary for me to monitor their daily activities. To do this, I must be allowed to tag them and since I don’t have a label-making machine or a Sharpie I have to rely instead on what Mother Nature gave me. 

This procedure becomes impossible to implement when gnomes are embedded behind decorative fences, hidden near solar-powered resin mushroom caps, stashed by the evil bottom-less pond or squirreled away by marble fountains. 

Whether by accidental design or purposeful craft, Mommy has placed these 10-inch decorations out of my reach. 

It just needs to be emphasized at this point, as my manifesto states quite clearly, that it is in my best interest that she not do this anymore. 

Garden Gnomes are considered to be special symbols of hope, luck, and good karma. If I can’t properly tag and monitor them, for their own good and protection, of course, how am I suppose to reap the rewards of the benefits they offer?

,-._,-.
./)"(/
(_o_)
oo--oo]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Scavenger Hunt</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/164392</link>

				<pubdate>Sat, 10 Jun 2006 12:10:14 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/164392</guid>
		<description>I seem to have a bit of an addictive personality. I have suspected this all along but didn't know fo ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I seem to have a bit of an addictive personality. I have suspected this all along but didn't know for sure until Dogster posted this Scavenger Hunt game. 

That first day I sniffed around and around and couldn't stop until I found all but 2 of the answers. With a little help from a friend (thanks again!!!) I was able to complete the task and rest my weary paws but up until I posted my answers I was in a state of frenzied excitement. 

Now, I don't know what other sufferer's do when they complete a task and are left basking in the warm fuzzy rush of endorphins that ensue but I used the energy from it to play my own home game of Scavenger Hunt with Mommy. 

Mommy didn't even realize we were playing it until I brought her a key item in the game. 

She actually tried to re-hide the bent, half chewed, pheasant feather that I laid on her lap. 

Go figure. 

I retrieved it from its new garbage bin hiding place and I put it in my basket of toys along with the other items on my game list:

Mud-covered little blue metal hot wheels car, sans the hood which I ate last year. Don't ever try that by the way. It doesn't taste like chicken. 

The properly gnawed-on heel of a strappy red shoe that didn't survive the Shoe Game. I got a time out for this one but it was worth it in the long run. 

3 paper towels that the cat helped me aquire. Thanks, Furball.

1 magazine cover section showing someone's famous baby's leg. The rest of the cover didn't handle my stress-test chew-a-thon and was promptly vaccum'd up by my distracted Mommy. 

1 rolled up set of Daddy's socks. Well, it looks like a toy. They should really be thankful that I have settled for this one pair and not commandeered the whole drawer full. I mean come on, everyone knows that ALL toys and toy-like things in my house belong to me. 

1 drinking straw that tastes like a cherry slurpee. Yummy!

Eventually I will get Mommy more involved with this game. She needs a refresher course anyway on the rules. She seems to think that she can re-hide all of my important stuff in the garbage can and that's not how the game is played at all.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Bag Tag</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/133714</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 21 Mar 2006 14:37:39 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/133714</guid>
		<description>Lots of kudos to Dogster for the cute new freebie Bag Tag. 

Everyone, especially at my groomer&acirc; ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Lots of kudos to Dogster for the cute new freebie Bag Tag. 

Everyone, especially at my groomer’s, noticed my shiny new Dogster sticker that Mommy sent away for and put on my bag……

I even think it may have helped me get my unofficial, self-awarded,  most pawpular St. Pawdy’s Day Spaw Day Shamrock Bandana Award.

See, I went to my groomer’s on Friday because, let’s face it, my fur was a little outta control. Mommy said I was starting to resemble Chewbacca and she wanted more of an eWok look for me, so under the clippers I cautiously went. 

It all turned out for the best. I pranced and preened myself silly and earned major cutie points, plus the bandana, which I wore proudly for the rest of the day, even after it slipped and turned itself into a bib (which they always do on their own, no tugging help from me, I swear)

So back to the kudos. 

Thank you, Dogster, for my new Bag Tag. You have my permission to use a likeness of me on the next series of stickers you give away if you want to. 

I will even pose for photos for them if you prefer (small appearance fee may apply, see Mommy for details)

I would also require reimbursement for my travel costs, meals, not to mention a generous paw-diem and permission to bring Mommy with me, of course.

I think it bears mentioning that I look cute in holiday gear so if you wanted to plan it accordingly, please feel free. 

Thank you for your consideration. 

.......-.__.-.
......l /)"(| /
Joey(_o_) Pawz
.......................]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Meanie Greenies?</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/120683</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 14 Feb 2006 16:10:25 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/120683</guid>
		<description>Yikes............Mommy saw the following news story on cnn.com:

http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/02/14/ ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Yikes............Mommy saw the following news story on cnn.com:

http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/02/14/dangerous.dogtreat/index.html

which in part states the following:

..........................at least 13 dogs have died after being fed the top-selling pet treat in the country, owners and veterinarians have told CNN. 

The problem comes because the treats, called Greenies, become lodged in a dog's esophagus or intestine and then some veterinarians say they don't break down.

Greenies recommends owners check that the treats are chewed and Joe Roetheli - who launched the brand as a treat that can freshen a dog's breath and clean its teeth - said it was important to pick the correct chew for a particular dog. There are 7 different sizes to choose from depending on the size of the dog.

 ,-._,-.
.\/)"(\/
  (_o_)
oo--oo Say it isn't sooooooooooooo]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Some self-evident truths about pets...</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/112251</link>

				<pubdate>Thu, 19 Jan 2006 14:59:09 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/112251</guid>
		<description>Buy a dog a toy and it will play with it forever. Buy a cat a present and it will play with the wrap ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Buy a dog a toy and it will play with it forever. Buy a cat a present and it will play with the wrapper for 10 minutes.

Dogs and cats instinctively know the exact moment their owners will wake up. Then they wake them 10 minutes sooner.

Dog's have owners. Cat's have staff.

Dogs shed, cats shred.

Ever wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult?

No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.

I hope to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.

We wonder why the dogs always drink out of our toilets, but look at it from their point of view: Why do humans keep peeing into their water bowls?

Women and cats will do as they please... men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.

In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Does Your Dog Own You?</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/111548</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 17 Jan 2006 09:25:47 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/111548</guid>
		<description>See how many of these statements apply to you and your dog. 

1. You believe every dog is a lap do ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ See how many of these statements apply to you and your dog. 

1. You believe every dog is a lap dog. 
2. If you are cold, you put a sweater on your dog. 
3. You have a picture of your dog in your wallet, but not one of your kids. 
4. You often claim that it was love at first sight with you and your dog. 
5. You have your dog talk to your friends on the phone. 
6. You can't fully enjoy yourself without your dog. 
7. No matter how large your bed is, it is not large enough for you and your dog(s). 
8. You spend more on clothes and food for your dog than you do for yourself. 
9. You have no reservations about kissing your dog on the lips, even when you know where his lips have been. 
10. You believe it is your duty to talk to, pat, and even feed every dog in the neighborhood. You know their names. 
11. You let the neighbor dog sleep over. 
12. You believe there is no such thing as a naughty dog. 
13. Your vet and grooming bills exceed your rent. 
14. When you need someone to talk to, your dog is your first choice. 
15. You sit on the floor if the dog got in the chair first. 
16. You talk to your dog when you are driving. He answers. 
17. Your dog taught you to fetch and roll over.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>The Great Punkin</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/88893</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 1 Nov 2005 13:59:35 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/88893</guid>
		<description>Halloween&acirc;&brvbar;&acirc;&brvbar;&acirc;&brvbar;&acirc;&brvbar;.it&acirc;s not like Christmas-time when you have to accumulate nice points and try ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Halloween………….it’s not like Christmas-time when you have to accumulate nice points and try extra hard to hide the naughty stuff. 

I don’t think so anyway………….. but I could be wrong. In fact, I might be on a time out right now because of it. I am not exactly sure though and Mommy doesn’t seem to know either……..yet.

Yesterday was my 2nd experience with Halloween. The first time doesn’t really count because back then I was more interested in my tail then what was going on at the door but this time I was on patrol and in full Alpha-mode and none of the Halloween traffic scared me……..too much. 

To recap my most recent naughty endeavors, I would have to guess that it all started to go south for me on Sunday when Mommy put her painted pumpkins on the island in the kitchen. 

See, it’s like this……….one of the furballs taught me how to jump onto the island from the back of the sofa and although this gives Mommy some brief heart attack-like symptoms she has pretty much let it slide for the most part, after some finger waving and ‘no no’ noises. 

Well, Mommy’s painted pumpkin did look like a crack fiend with a gaping head wound. It was practically begging for a closer inspection and I am never one to shirk my Inspector duties so up I leapt. 

A closer look just confirmed what my distant crackhead appraisal already noted……this object did not belong in my immediate environment. 

My only courses of action at that time had to be to either chomp/chew/shred it or make my mark on it. 

Now, I happen to like canned pumpkin. It’s tasty and apparently does good things for the lower area of my body when nature isn’t taking care of business on it’s own but this live and up close version of pumpkin left a lot to be desired. That being the case then, I chose option #2. 

I showed that pumpkin just whose house it was in and who was boss of it until Mommy turned around and had what I can only describe now as an Anti-Joey moment. 

Things got progressively worse the next night. 

I think it’s important at this juncture to insert the following statement: 

If you come to my door wearing a lion costume, no matter how big or small you are, you should be prepared to play.  C.A.T. in Joey World means Chase. Aggravate. Taunt. So I don’t know why that part was bad except the scaredy-cat lion’s mom had to pick him up and all I got for my trouble was some finger-wagging bad-puppy verbal abuse. 

I have to own up to the fact that I did refuse to be put out back or in another room and I made it all but impossible for Mommy to answer the door, hold the candy bowl and dish out Skittles and M&M’s on her own. 

Her solution for this dilemma worked for me but all things considered, I think she would have had it another way. 

As it was, she picked me up every time the doorbell rang and held me and the candy bowl with one hand and answered the door and told all the kids to grab a handful themselves. I got to greet everyone personally and I even got to play tug-o-war with some of the skittles bags when kids were kinda slow grabbing them and everyone else (except the lion) loved me so even if I did launch myself right into a time out then I don’t think it should be a long one. 

Besides, the sooner this all blows over the better. Thanksgiving is just around the corner and I am getting me some turkey, one way or another…………..

.......-.__.-.
......l /)"(| /
Joey(_o_) Pawz
.......................]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Paw e-Piphany</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/80762</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 3 Oct 2005 14:24:43 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/80762</guid>
		<description>Paws are very handy to have around. Opposable thumbs might just be highly overrated in light of this ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Paws are very handy to have around. Opposable thumbs might just be highly overrated in light of this paw epiphany that I’ve had recently. 

Paws, when presented right, look very cute and are hard to ignore. They are ideal for shaking, not to mention excellent general attention getter’s when little ‘ruffs’ don’t work and I just can’t bring myself to work up a big bark in the middle of the night when nature calls. 

……….Nothing like a subtle paw tapping on Mommy’s cheek to get her up outta bed. That and a well placed nose lick. Works like a charm every time…………..

Another Paw-Pro is that I get to dig stuff up (flowers, imaginary critters stuck deep in the earth in need of Super-Joey to come to their rescue) not to mention all of the unsolicited help I give Mommy by pouncing on billowy sheets when she makes the bed. 


In light of all of that, you’d think I couldn’t be happier with my matching set of handy paws but every rose has it’s thorn and I am afraid that the same holds true for paw-bearers. 

For instance, I can’t type very well. I guess I could try more often but you’d all need Joey-Typo-Decoder-Rings and Mommy hasn’t begun production on those yet. 

She is still waiting to hear back from the Cracker Jack people about a lucrative contract so until then, I will just let Mommy continue to translate and spare you all from my abnormally brilliant typos. 

Example: Jhuz9jkgz99(k lsol=’sd[ls ssd0=^%

Hey, even I don’t know what it means, just that I was feeling a bit hungry at the time I typed it so part of it might say Scooby Snax……

I suppose I could practice and hone my typing skills but it needs to be noted here that, out of necessity, Mommy has restricted my desktop time and I’m not allowed to have any more unsupervised computer access. 

I don’t know why I was cut off exactly, except she said something about how a slobbery mouse can get mighty difficult to maneuver.

I guess I won’t miss it though. It’s too hard to  "mark" every web site that I visit anyway.

It’s also pretty frustrating when that guy who keeps saying  "You've Got Mail" doesn’t react at all to my ferocious gruffy barks. 

So, no computer time……..it’s all for the best I suppose……I am probably saving myself years of agony from Carpal Paw Syndrome thus freeing up more time to dig flowers and save imaginary buried critters. 

,-._,-.
./)"(/
(_o_)
oo--oo…the work of a Superhero is never done........]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Prima Doga</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/77072</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 19 Sep 2005 11:03:37 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/77072</guid>
		<description>Even I have to admit I was getting a bit shaggy. Normally my fur is soft and shiny when Mommy lets i ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Even I have to admit I was getting a bit shaggy. Normally my fur is soft and shiny when Mommy lets it grow out a bit but with all the outdoorsy excursions we have been on lately, even routine baths and brushes didn’t tame my wild mane. 

Yep, you guessed it…… it was time for me to go to another spaw day. Spaw days are ok but since I have two separate groomers now, and I visit whichever one can fit me in when Mommy makes the call, you just never know what I will come home looking like.

One of my groomers makes me look like a teddy bear and I get awards when I go there but the other one buzz’s me right down and I get me no kind of extra lovin’ by way of awards or bandanas or treats. The upside of the buzz though is that I don’t have to go back nearly as often so I guess it’s kind of a toss up in the end on which one I prefer. 

  
I sometimes wonder if I am spoiled. There are times that I think I am but then I realize that I don’t have EVERYTHING that I want so I can’t possibly be that bad. 

I have heard of this new trend about dogs and gadgets. I could be down with that. 

First on my wish list would have to be my own cell phone. I have seen some for dogs but they tend to come with a GPS tracking system. 

http://www.engadget.com/entry/7042716626214795/

Next on my wish list would have to be a doggy digital camera! I could get some seriously vivid action shots of ducks in motion.  (wags)

http://www.engadget.com/entry/0647655998810633/

I could also use a Dog LED tail light broadcaster. I could post my own barks and props back there. 

http://www.engadget.com/entry/1234000063036632

Those particular gifts would probably push me over the line of what was considered spoiled though so maybe I better just stick with my regular fluffy toys and yummy treats for now.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Open Letter To Yamaha and Honda:</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/75467</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 12 Sep 2005 16:08:05 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/75467</guid>
		<description>Dear Quad Makers, 

The purpose of my letter to you today is to address the abhorrent neglect of n ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Dear Quad Makers, 

The purpose of my letter to you today is to address the abhorrent neglect of necessary and purposeful design that is currently infecting your ATV production line. In particular, the 660 Yamaha Raptors and the Honda 400.  

My Mommy goes quad’ing with her friends a lot and the quads don’t accommodate me at all. There are no soft seats for me, no fleece-lined baskets to put me in, no restraining devices with which to secure my cute lil’ tooshie and no readily available accessories (goggles, appropriate head gear, basket pillows) that people can purchase for me on any one of the many significant gift-giving occasions throughout the year. 

I am sure you will agree with me that the marketing potential here is as tail-waggingly vast as the profit possibilities. In fact, from the numbers I have been able to throw together, it would seem to be catastrophic for any company not to immediately jump on this golden bullet and ride it straight to the bank.

I, for one, eagerly await your new and improved line of ATV’s, which are Joey-friendly and will also provide a much-needed service for my Mommy. 

Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions. I am also available to help in product development although I feel it is necessary to mention at this time that I have a note from my Mommy, which prohibits me from participating in any of the crash tests that will need to be performed. 

Thank you for your time and attention to this matter.  I am sure you will agree with me that this is of the gravest importance and that by all working together we can quickly and effectively right a grievous wrong, restoring  balance to the Mommy/Joey interaction time that has been badly displaced since  discovery of the above-mentioned product defect. 

Sincerely yours, 

.......-.__.-.
......l /)"(| /
Joey(_o_) Pawz
.......................]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Warm Towels</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/70570</link>

				<pubdate>Wed, 24 Aug 2005 09:56:24 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/70570</guid>
		<description>I made a duck holler (yes, ducks holler, especially when I&acirc;m hot on their tail, trying to herd the ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I made a duck holler (yes, ducks holler, especially when I’m hot on their tail, trying to herd them in the house, thru the French doors)

Mommy had just set the laundry basket down on the floor to investigate the hollaring and try run interference just as I darted into the house, hopping and bouncing, paws and legs and undercarriage as muddy as can be and launched myself right into her basket of clean towels. 

I even burrowed down into the warm towels wagging my tail in unrestrained puppy delight. 

You can bet I got a time out for that one!

Well, after my bath and cookie, of course.
 ,-._,-.
.\/)"(\/
  (_o_)
oo--oo]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>The Crouchy-Charge Game</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/70318</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 23 Aug 2005 13:37:00 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/70318</guid>
		<description>I finally made nice-nice with the ducks. This is no small feat, mind you. I deserve a medal.....an a ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I finally made nice-nice with the ducks. This is no small feat, mind you. I deserve a medal.....an award...... or a commendation at least for all of my tenacity and perseverance. 

You see, ever since Mommy brought me home I have wildly charged all the other animals with that rev'd up, ears flapping, paws pumping, hopping, bouncing run that I have perfected and all the animals look at me like I am demon spawn.

Well, there I was minding my own business, looking for things to upheave, as is my nature……….. so I wandered out onto the patio and there was my nemesis, the dark duck, Duct-Tape, all crouched down in the grass, squared off to charge me.

 My first instinct was to rush out and pounce and roll that duck to break up her unauthorized critter formation and head off any possible counter attack that she might be planning but the resulting altercation drew Mommy’s attention to the sidelines and instead of intervening, like she normally does, she stayed put and cautiously watched us. 

The following is a play-by-play of said event, slightly edited to make myself look better, because let’s face it, I need all the angel points I can get….even fake ones. 

……Duct-Tape charged me and I shrank back a bit but didn't run. Then I crouched down and charged Duct-Tape and she shrank back a bit.  We did this 3 times before Mommy finally figured out that we were playing. I guess for all she knew we could have been in some weird animal joust, fighting for control of the back yard, but my wagging tail told her otherwise.

Mommy ended up laughing at us both and went back inside. So, even though Mommy didn’t stay to play the crouchy-charge game with me and the duck, I still had fun. 

Ducks are just entertaining like that.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Marking Territory</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/67451</link>

				<pubdate>Fri, 12 Aug 2005 15:18:39 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/67451</guid>
		<description>Yeah, I do it. Come on, who hasn&acirc;t lifted a paw here or there and claimed a little piece of nature ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Yeah, I do it. Come on, who hasn’t lifted a paw here or there and claimed a little piece of nature as their own? 

I have to admit it though, I was never much of a marker before I went camping. Once I got there how could I resist all of those scents and the olfactory oblivion it spiraled me into?  Running amok, sniffing here and there, marking tree and rock and shrub alike is the stuff of dreams, you know. 

Well, that’s all fine and dandy up in the mountains and Mommy just smiled and called me her “Little Tinkler” when she saw me do it there but lift one little paw at home and POOF into the dog house I go with no delay. Pfffffffft.

Suffice it to say, I have had to quickly master the distinction between appropriate things to mark and non-appropriate things to mark. 

I think I’ve done a pretty remarkable job of picking up these new and seemingly unfair and restrictive guidelines in such a short period of time but there are a few gray areas that I am not too clear about. 

For example, I accept that the laundry basket isn’t an appropriate place but surely the litter box is? Those furballs leave things in there that are far worse than anything I bring to the party (or box as it were) but when I tested the waters (hehehe) in this area Mommy got her paper towels in a bunch and I ended up on a time-out. 

So from what I gather to date, anything outdoors is fair game and Mommy’s general lack of concern in this area seems to support that theory….so far. 

That being the case, I should then admit that part of me knows I shouldn’t mark the duck’s nest. It’s the same part of me that doesn’t really care but I just think it needed to be noted that SOME part of me knows it at least.

You see, the ducks had a nest back in June with 14 eggs in it until something came and stole them all (Mommy thinks it was a Opossum)  

Hey, I know what you’re thinking but it wasn’t me, honest…………the eggs disappeared at nighttime and I sleep inside which gives me an ironclad alibi at that particular time (wags)

Well, just so you know, you should never underestimate a duck, which I have come to know through trial and error while I hone and fine-tune my duck chasing game. 

Those ducks are crafty. Momma Duck laid 5 new eggs this time in a small space that has only one entrance and she camouflaged this with dirt and bark and dark feathers so you can barely see the eggs. Then about 3 feet away she laid 12 eggs out in the open and left those as sacrifices to the Opossum Gods. 

I think both nests are primed for marking but Momma Duck doesn’t agree. She lets me mark up the sacrificial nest all I want but so far she won’t let me near the hidden nest. 

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, what’s a Little Tinkler to do?


.......-.__.-.
......l /)"(| /
.ruff (_o_) ruff
.......................]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>That's my story..............</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/66073</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 8 Aug 2005 08:36:16 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/66073</guid>
		<description>I didn't do it. 
It almost killed me. 
I mean, it all happened in the spur of the moment. 
Um...  ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I didn't do it. 
It almost killed me. 
I mean, it all happened in the spur of the moment. 
Um... I... Uh, it was an accident. 
How can I think at a time like this?
ack.......::::calling PETA::::....

.......Good Afternoon, PETA, Stuffed Wings*n*Legs Division

Yeah, it died... That's all... it just died. That's it. HeHeHe....No foul play over here. I'm adorable and don't know how to do things like that

........You are speaking a fur-language and will need to press 4 for a translator

*pressing 4(10 times in a row)* grumble gruff gruff  grrrr ruffy

........Hello, please proceed......What is the nature of your call. 

I was minding my own business and Mommy's fluffy giraffe, the one she got when she adopted one of the giraffes at the zoo, leapt up and taunted me. I tried to ignore it but it wouldn't back down. It challenged me and I walked away.....honest......then it called out to me from the other room......it baited me in....I think it may be better off now. In a better place and all that......I can't be held accountable right? I was victimized but I thought I should call and cover my tracks....I mean seek some sort of support for the trauma I've suffered.........

........Can the giraffe be repaired?

Your question is bringing back those.... gulp... awful memories....... Sorry, but I am overcome by emotion. Do stuffed giraffe's have spirits that might haunt a puppy? At the time of execution......I mean, at the time of my well executed extreme mortal danger and defensive maneuvers........there seemed to be some unidentifiable debris floating in and around the instigating perpetrator in question.......Is that bad?

......Is the giraffe stuffing salvageable?

Define salvageable? Variety is the spice of life, right? Mommy needs a continuous cycle of circulation among her collectables and it’s a service I am happy to offer for her out of the goodness of my own heart (and free of charge, I might add) 

........But can the giraffe be fixed?

Maybe it was girafficide? What a cruel cruel world.............

........Poor giraffe. Bad puppy. How could you? Do you often exhibit these kinds of uncontrollable fits of rage?

Poor giraffe? What about poor Joey? They might lock me up and throw away the greenies! The whole thing is just a blur now. I think he came after me with a Kong and I defended myself. He just wouldn't stop provoking me! I couldn't take it anymore!!! Ahem... I mean, he came after me with a Kong.  

Yeah, that's what happened. That's my story..............]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Summer Daze</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/65346</link>

				<pubdate>Fri, 5 Aug 2005 10:37:17 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/65346</guid>
		<description>I haven&acirc;t written any entries for a while so now I have to play catch-up. 
First of all, Mommy po ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I haven’t written any entries for a while so now I have to play catch-up. 
First of all, Mommy posted some pictures of the ducks. They are named: Frois Gras, Aflac and Tape (yes, duct)…………Daddy named them when he brought them home as a surprise for Mommy. Mommy says Daddy isn’t allowed to name any more pets by himself. 

Then what happened…Let’s see…….…….One day last week Mommy’s work had a “Joey Day”

I got to go to work with her and there were two other doggies there. Well, one dog named Zeus (big friendly golden lab) and a puppy named Bianca (little black lab)……

Bianca is bigger than me but not older so I am the boss of her. Mommy brought my weekend bag with some toys and we all had fun playing together and we really did try not to grrrrrrrrrr too much when 
people were on the phone. I’m serious………..Honest……and I didn’t break that vase……..not me………no way……..….well, Bianca did it……….maybe not all of ‘it’ but she is still little and doesn’t know how to pass the blame yet. (wags)

Hmm, what else haven’t I written about? Oh, we went camping again last weekend and I went swimming!!! On my own, 4 different times!!!! Woo hooo go, me!

Mommy was out swimming in a cove with her friend and I was on the shore watching. I don’t know how I am supposed to protect her when she is far away like that so I got worried and walked in up to my tummy. I was making little whimper noises and pawing at the water and Daddy came by and picked me up and walked in a little further. 

That’s when I decided to go for it!

I jumped right out of Daddy’s arms into the water and started paddling to where Mommy was. She saw me and swam over to me, meeting me half way and scooped me up in her arms! Yay!!!!! I made it.

She took me back to shore and I was shaking a little bit but my tail was wagging like crazy and Mommy said she was soooooooooo proud of me. I did it 3 more times!!  

I am soooo ready for Puppy Olympics now! Bring it on!!]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Swimming 101</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/60511</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 19 Jul 2005 11:53:14 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/60511</guid>
		<description>Some fur-bearer&acirc;s weren&acirc;t meant to swim, others take to water like ducks to, well, water, I gues ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Some fur-bearer’s weren’t meant to swim, others take to water like ducks to, well, water, I guess...... 

Just so you know, I can play with the garden hose like a pro. I can paw up water streams and pounce puddles with the best of them and I have even mastered how to drag a running hose around the patio helping mommy water stuff she didn’t know needed watering, including herself 

I am helpful like that

But……..way back when I first came to live with Mommy, I discovered that I have a natural aversion to deep bodies of water. I also learned that I have to apply my paw breaking system BEFORE I splash head first into the pond during the duck chasing game. 

This is mainly because I seem to immediately sink at rather an alarming rate. I have to note here that Mommy has excellent dip and recovery skills and has come to my rescue three times now with regards to the pond. 

So, the other day, we went to Mommy’s brother’s house for a pool and BBQ party. This has to be the single greatest summer excursion that a puppy can take! People tend to be very generous with grilled stuff and I even had enough to stash extra pieces all around the house. 

The only dark cloud that blighted my fun day was that huge swimming pool in the middle of the yard. I had no idea what to do with it. There were no ducks there to chase around it and all I knew for sure was that I didn’t want to get too close even though everyone was laughing and splashing and playing in it. 

But then.........I figured if I applied one of Mommy’s universal rules to this new endeavor I couldn’t go wrong. 

The rule is as follows:
Approach cautiously; play nice with the natives and no one gets hurt............

Sometimes that’s easier said than done. Then again, sometimes I, myself, am the native, and in cases such as duck games, they don’t play nice......... and my corresponding actions are completely justified  (wags)

So, keeping this general rule in mind, I inched closer and closer to the pool. Mommy made sure no one forced me and no one scared me and I got more and more fearless and pretty soon I was standing on one of the submerged steps all by myself!! 

Yay, me. 

I am way brave like that. Never mind that I didn’t get any further than that one step......... I totally conquered that pool. Now I just have to take on my pond for round # 4. 

I better wait till Mommy is around though, just in case……….]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Spaw Dayz</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/53217</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 20 Jun 2005 13:11:06 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/53217</guid>
		<description>I had a Spaw Day on Friday. I got my regular dorky teddy bear haircut, my nails done, my ears cleane ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I had a Spaw Day on Friday. I got my regular dorky teddy bear haircut, my nails done, my ears cleaned and some other stuff that I really don’t think I can mention in polite company. Suffice it to say everything was expelled nicely and I have nothing more to add to that. 

I was on my best behavior and the groomer’s gave me their coveted ‘blue bandana award’ for being soooooooooooo fabulously cute and entertaining. 

I wore it proudly all day even when it slipped and turned itself into a bib. 

Mommy says I looked a bit like the Abominable Snowman when I went in to the groomer’s and a cute fuzzy-wuzzy bear when I came out. 

That’s all good, I guess. 

I’m highly huggable either way.

.......-.__.-.
......l /)"(| /
.ruff (_o_) ruff
.......................]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Crazy Lunch</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/50989</link>

				<pubdate>Fri, 10 Jun 2005 15:11:55 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/50989</guid>
		<description>All good intentions aside, people just really shouldn&acirc;t rush up to Mommy in scary disheveled state ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ All good intentions aside, people just really shouldn’t rush up to Mommy in scary disheveled states and tell her that I have been busy running amok in traffic. Mommy tends to panic at news like that..............

This person I’m going to call Crazy Lady was over the edge. Now it has to be said that my Mommy loves animals. Mommy goes to a great deal of effort to help all animals, even ones she’s never met and ones that I’ve never sniffed before but this lady took that to a weird extreme. 

She said she liked to drive around looking for strays. She was clutching 4 leashes and said she takes the strays that she finds home with her or to the shelter. 

She ran up to Mommy from the street when Mommy came home from work for lunch just to have some quality “joey"  time (I’m entertaining like that you know) and she said, “ I almost caught your little dog! He has been in and out of traffic all morning but growls when I get too close to him”

After Mommy’s heart stopped flip-flopping and she figured out it couldn’t possibly be ME……………she asked Crazy Lady where the dog was, what kind it was, what happened and so on trying to get to the heart of the matter and swim through Crazy Lady’s projected foggy perception of reality. 

Crazy Lady said, “He is a wiener dog and I got close enough to see his collar tag and he lives on this street and he tried to get in your back yard at one point and it really is a lovely quiet street but you shouldn’t let him run free like this”

Now, last time Mommy checked I wasn’t a wiener dog. I’m way too fluffy for one thing and my tail drapes over like a weeping willow for another. 

Mommy politely informed Crazy Lady that the wiener dog does live nearby somewhere, we have seen him from time to time.......just not sure exactly where. The street is pretty quiet and although Mommy agreed wholeheartedly that he shouldn’t be outside like that, he was probably not in mortal danger. 

Crazy Lady said she had to get him and she had called and chased him for quite some time already but he growls at her whenever she gets close. 

I would grrrrrrr too if she chased me waving leashes and yelling like that. 

All Mommy could really think to say was, “good luck with that and please stop scaring people” before she came inside to play with me.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>As The Egg Turns</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/49916</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 6 Jun 2005 09:48:02 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/49916</guid>
		<description>My Mommy has decided, in her newly questionable infinite wisdom, to allow one of the momma ducks to  ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ My Mommy has decided, in her newly questionable infinite wisdom, to allow one of the momma ducks to have babies. 

It seems as though those wiley rascally ducks got busy during our 4 day camping trip and created a nest of sorts in the newly cultivated back yard shrub beds, deposited 14 eggs there and began to actively ‘sit’ them. 

Before this singularly organized procreational push of theirs, they had always just deposited their eggs in random places (the patio, floating in the pond, all over the yard like Easter eggs) and they never sat on them then even though they sometimes displayed protective traits towards their eggs……………especially when I claimed them as bounty and carted them off for disassembling. 

This time, however, all three of them are extremely protective and they’ve also taken to initiating the chase game on their own even when I’m nowhere near their big dumb nest. 

So anyway, Mommy said she didn’t have the heart to remove the eggs and she made arraignments with a friend of hers who has a lot of land for the babies to eventually go live there once they are grown up a bit. 

This whole business bodes well for my gaming needs but how am I supposed to stop myself from chasing the baby ducks till they are old enough to chase back.

I can’t see this having a happy ending, especially if it means my back yard free time has to be cropped and monitored now. 

Everyone knows that backyards belong to puppies, not ducks. 

I think Mommy should have a duck egg intervention and prevent all this extracurricular duck activity but who am I to turn down more play buddies. Even if they don’t know the rules to my games yet they can help me plot a hostile take-over bid for full control of the back yard again. 

~ grrrrr ruffy]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Oh, Deer</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/48765</link>

				<pubdate>Wed, 1 Jun 2005 16:09:05 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/48765</guid>
		<description>Yay Me! I got to go camping for the first time ever!!! 

I had so much fun and I was on my best be ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Yay Me! I got to go camping for the first time ever!!! 

I had so much fun and I was on my best behavior most of the time. Well, it is hard to be 100% good in the face of such constant temptation like I was exposed to…………but I persevered and everyone was so impressed with me that they all kept giving me unauthorized scooby snax all weekend. 

In fact, I had so many treats that I couldn’t possibly have eaten them all so I did the next best thing………I stashed them all over camp in secret spots for future consumption. I put some bacon in Mommy’s boot and some kibble in Angie’s shoe. I hid some stuff in Mommy sleeping bag and I put some sausage in the clothes bag. 

You just never know when you will need the extra energy those stashed goodies will provide. Which was exactly what happened when some deer wandered into my camp and I had to investigate and assess the danger to my Mommy. 

I got close enough to determine that they weren't a threat but they would make excellent alternate chasing buddies, and since my ducks were way back at home and couldn’t accommodate my current chasing game needs………I proceeded to explain the new game rules to those deer in my very loudest barky-ruff-arf-arf-umph voice but, frankly speaking, other species communication must lack fundamental puppy translation key codes because they misunderstood my descriptions of the game and instead of chasing me, which is how anybody who is anybody knows the game is played, they ran away from me. 

Well, I gave chase, thinking that they needed to see how it was properly done but the game was immediately called on account of some unfair ‘Mommy imposed proximity boundaries’ for the campsite and me. 

Mommy says I resembled a nappy dirty cotton ball when I got home but............swoooooosh………into the sink I went and some serious lathering, rinsing, repeating later I was all fluffy and soft again.  

We need to do that every weekend!!!]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Prince Joey</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/43093</link>

				<pubdate>Wed, 4 May 2005 13:38:31 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/43093</guid>
		<description>King-in-Training. Commander of Easily-Winded Mommy. Lord and Master of all I survey. Suffering from  ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ King-in-Training. Commander of Easily-Winded Mommy. Lord and Master of all I survey. Suffering from short-dog syndrome, like I do, that sometimes requires me to jump up on the sofa to increase the amount of domain I can feasibly survey, but it still counts. 

Let it also be known that I am the Victorious Hunter of Ducks. 

So far that just consists of one wounded squeaky duck on the floor and I don’t know how all that stuffing came out of it and got all over the house. Seriously. I didn't do anything to it. 

Okay.........I killed it…………it provoked me and I had to defend my kingdom.

Go Me!

Speaking of me, it’s almost my birthday and I have to say that 1-year old dogs shouldn’t be called puppy any longer. Mommy says she will always call me her puppy though because I look puppish but who is she kidding? 

I’m ferocious and mature and seasoned and aloof now and it just needs to be said that the fake throw doesn't fool me anymore……I am wayyyyyyyy past that. 

However, there are exceptions to growing up………like I still really want those healthy puppy treats in the green bag. They are chicken and rice sticks and I chomp them right down. 

Puppy or not, no matter how old I get, those should just keep right on coming!

To translate this birthday wish into Mommy language and being the Prince that I am…………I burp'd  in Mommy’s face to express how I feel about those particular yummies and how necessary they are. 

Hopefully she can take the hint and will keep bringing them home for me.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>11.5 months old</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/42583</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 2 May 2005 09:56:05 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/42583</guid>
		<description>My Birthday is only 14 days away!! 

This is my official notice that I am now currently accepting  ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ My Birthday is only 14 days away!! 

This is my official notice that I am now currently accepting presents and treats and extra lovies and I will continue to do so until well into June. 

I'm only doing this so you procrastinator’s out there won’t get too stressed from any power shopping that you need to do.  

It should be noted here that I feel comfortable being spoiled and pampered and multiple offerings will be appreciated and gladly accepted. 

Still though.......

Arriving at my 1-year birthday wasn’t a trip for the faint hearted. 

I survived the pitfalls of my backyard suburban jungle and a sinister-looking pond with those evil, hypnotizing fishies darting ‘round and round in their inviting, dizzying, swirling vortex. (I tested that ‘sink or swim’ concept and while I didn’t learn to swim I sure tested the heck outta Mommy’s panic reflexes) 

I survived vicious wild hordes of Mommy’s domesticated ducks. (3 can justifiably be considered a horde when they all chase you at one time)

I survived angry kitties with sharp claws and a zero-tolerance policy when it comes to cute lil’ puppies named Joey. (One of them sorta likes me now and by the time I turn 2 I bet they will all be my friends. Most people take to me right away because I’m way too cute and adorable to ignore but my natural charm seems to only work slowly on felines.)

I survived trips to the vet and evil outdated concepts of shots and surgeries. (It helps me cope when they shower me with attention and treats and pets. I respond well to bribery that way.)

Whew!

It’s a dog eat dog world out there and I’m ready to take it on. 

........well, just as soon as Mommy is ready to pick me up and carry me into it, that is.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Puptionary</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/41950</link>

				<pubdate>Fri, 29 Apr 2005 09:45:55 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/41950</guid>
		<description>I have decided to start my pre-birthday present campaign early. The way I figure it is that you only ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I have decided to start my pre-birthday present campaign early. The way I figure it is that you only turn 1 once and the event should be celebrated with extra displays of affection, extra special treats, my very own puppy cake and toys. Lots and lots of toys. 

If I get the word out and recruit the other furries in my house I should be well covered by May 15th but this campaigning business is not going to be as easy as it first seems though. 

Take this example for instance………..

Mommy was sorting through a laundry basket full of socks and others things that don’t bear mentioning since the socks were the most important part of it. 

She tossed all the socks in a pile and I tugged out all of the socks I thought would make good toys. I laid down on my pile of chosen socks to help demonstrate my point too. 

She is being extra sly about my birthday though because she acted like she didn’t know what I was up to and she ignored my hints about the blue socks altogether. 

Then, last night, 2 of my uncles and my favorite little niece came over for dinner………this afforded me the opportunity to corral 6 of their shoes and 2 pink socks into my game zone, making a somewhat wobbly arrow pointing right at my big floor toy basket. 

I positioned everything accordingly, for optimum effect, but I don’t know if anyone noticed. I think Mommy saw the pattern eventually and hopefully she picked up on my clues. 

If I had opposable thumbs I would draw her pictures but until they grow in I’ll just have to play more puptionary games and hope she catches on.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Furry Friends</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/41266</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 26 Apr 2005 11:06:04 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/41266</guid>
		<description>One of my Pup Pals, Sully, and his Mommy brought something to me and my Mommy&acirc;s attention yesterda ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ One of my Pup Pals, Sully, and his Mommy brought something to me and my Mommy’s attention yesterday that is more than a little frightening. It has been on my Mommy’s mind and she has been wrestling with the issue, trying to make sense of it. 

www.iamscruelty.com 

What we are referring to is the unethical treatment of animals. This is a vast topic with many valid and equally horrifying platforms but specifically, here today, Mommy wants to address the abuse of dogs in laboratories. 

Labs that are associated with pet food companies trying to slap New and Improved stickers on their packages at any expense, even the cost of innocent furries who were unfortunate enough to be abandoned or orphaned or born into it…….unfortunate enough to be captured and locked away, sometimes to die a horrible painful death, all the while being poked and prodded and left to suffer alone, amid a sea of white coats and unsympathetic clinical detached stares.

Compassionate people cannot imagine that dogs could be living those kinds of nightmares in laboratories. But they do. Every day. Yesterday and Today. Many many dogs do and many of the experiments and testing are government sanctioned and even government required. In many of these cases the testing could be done alternatively or virtually, using safe and humane methods. It’s been noted that many of the tests that are still done today on animals are not even reliable or accurate. 

I look at my sweet little Joey and the thought of someone hurting him, of using his immune system to test their chemicals, of burning him, cutting pieces of him off his body and dumping him in a cold isolated cages just fills me with a sadness that I cannot begin to describe. 

Every dog in those places was a puppy once. Every delicate nose, that’s been locked away and abused, tried at some point in their life, to imprint the scent of someone, the one person, who it felt closest to, upon itself. Every set of eyes from those cages looks out for help. Awareness is a cognitive form not solely limited to people. 

One of the special gifts in our lives comes from our Furry friend’s unconditional love. Every person deserves to experience this and every Furry deserves to feel it. 

Respect for human life is grounded in the respect for all life, even though they may offer justifications for treating dogs as horribly as this, it is not a legal issue alone, it is a moral issue, that each person must weigh and consider themselves. 

Answer to yourself, first and foremost, and in doing that look in the mirror of your soul. Glimpse what humanity means to you and from your reactions, from your actions, understand the strength of just who you are. 

Before yesterday I would have never associated IAMS with any type of animal cruelty. It's truly surprising, especially given their marketing trend of portraying happy healthy pets and pet-friendly products.

This information makes a difference as, in a situation where the reasons don’t justify the actions, the details strengthen people’s resolve.

An important thing to recognize about this is that the people who will be most outraged by this awful abuse are the very people who care enough about their little furry friends to purchase the better foods for them, such as IAMS (or what was previously thought of as IAMS)

Discovering the problem is one of the first steps towards change. People's awareness and media attention now will go along way toward making this a mainstream issue. 

Once it's a mainstream issue positive results will inevitably follow. 

Every action, however small, is a piece of the completed puzzle. 
Iams claims to be a leader in the pet food industry. It is well past time they started to act like one and begin a truly “New and Improved” era in pet food, not just continued abuse for the sake of those shiny new stickers on their packaging at animal’s expense.

The Joey’s out there in the world deserve no less. 

Best wishes for our mistreated little furries!!!! 

Life is life -- whether in a cat, or dog or man. There is no difference there between a cat or a man. The idea of difference is a human conception for man's own advantage..." --Sri Aurobindo

"If the creature could suffer and experience pleasure - that is, if it was sentient - then it would be entitled to have its suffering and pleasure compared and weighed against the similar suffering and pleasure of other sentient creatures, including humans" -- Andrew N. Rowan]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Strawberry Kisses</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/40476</link>

				<pubdate>Fri, 22 Apr 2005 11:24:42 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/40476</guid>
		<description>Mommy&acirc;s little niece came over last night and she is fun to play with. I showed her how to properl ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Mommy’s little niece came over last night and she is fun to play with. I showed her how to properly parade around the ducks for attention and she showed me how to jump up and down on the ottoman. 

Little girls are also very generous with BBQ ribs and watermelon too which I am all on board for. Come to think of it, she is always sharing things with me. Her toys, her meals……….blame for broken things and blame for messes………

Not that I don’t participate completely and enjoy myself immensely in the process but I’m still trying to be extra cute and adorable this week to help gloss over that unfortunate duck egg incident last weekend. 

Well, good intentions can only get a puppy so far before normal natural instincts kick in. 

Such was the case last night when I saw a container of sweet smelling powdery pink candy substance on the coffee table. 

Who would fault me for sniffing it? 

Who could blame me for the gigantic sneeze that erupted as a result of that sniff? 

Well, let me just tell you……………powdery candy sugary substance’s sure do travel far and wide in the wake of a puppy sneeze. 

It was on me, on the sofa, the carpet.......and all over the table. 

I got worried and tried to clean some of it up right away and that’s when I saw Mommy laughing at me! 

She picked me up, hugged me and then she gave me a bunch of her special “Bless You” nuzzles. 

I gave her back Strawberry candy flavored kisses. 

:)]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Scratch-n-Sniff</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/39475</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 18 Apr 2005 14:10:48 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/39475</guid>
		<description>I was on a time out yesterday because I got in trouble for playing with the duck&acirc;s eggs again. 
 ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I was on a time out yesterday because I got in trouble for playing with the duck’s eggs again. 

Release from my time out was conditional upon my agreeing to perform a valid community service to help atone for my naughtiness. Well, that and my innocent, adorable, big dark sad eyes, cute button nose and my “who me? lil ol’ me?” look. 

That ‘look’ works on Mommy every time. It just took a little longer than usual yesterday, that’s all. 

So, in order to complete my community service requirements I will dutifully record my  bad puppy deeds here today in an effort to help teach future bad puppies what not to do when presented with similar highly tempting situations.  

…There I was, minding my own business, playing in the sunshine and having a serious game of Scratch-n-Sniff in the back yard when what to my wondering eyes did appear but a nest full of eggs and two angry  ducks near…………. 

What could I do? It’s in the official-yet-unwritten pupster contract that I investigate this thoroughly to asses any possible present or future threat to my Mommy. 

Those ducks were watching me pretty close and didn’t seem to care that I honor my Pupster contract so I had to pretend I was looking at ladybugs at first. Then I inched forward two steps and darted back one, over and over again until I reached right out and snatched one of those eggs with my mouth. 

I peeled out of there so fast that those ducks didn’t know what happened at first. Lucky for me Mommy had the french doors open and I could make good my escape. 

I safely deposited my egg bounty, known now as Stolen Toy #1, on the sofa in the house and never being one to leave a good game unfinished, I proceeded to Scratch-n-Sniff the Stolen Toy. 

I must have accidentally swiped a defective one because it broke apart really easy. I’m not sure what was exactly in my Stolen Toy but the yellow parts of what came out of it were fun to play in.  

Just as I was dipping all four of my paws into the yellow goo this angry momma duck came into the house yelling at  me. 

I invited the duck to play my Scratch-n-Sniff game but she was having none of that. 

Then I tried to tell her that she wasn’t allowed in the house and Mommy wouldn’t like her being there but she didn’t care about that either. 

That’s when Mommy got involved. 

Now usually when a duck wanders in through the french doors Mommy just says ‘no no no out you go lil duck’ and they turn around and leave and she said that again this time but the angry duck didn’t leave. 

Instead, that duck must have used some secret duck mind transference trick to distract Mommy’s attention from her being in the house because that’s when Mommy turned and looked at me and her eyes got big and her hand flew to cover her mouth and I jumped up and got excited because I thought it was a new game we were gonna play and she squeaked something that kind of sounded like ‘ohhhhhhhhhh nooooooooooooooo’ and then the duck started yelling again and waddling around and, oh my goodness, yes, it really IS necessary for me to chase them every time they waddle......... so I don’t really see why that part was so bad except my paws still had that yellow goo all over the  them…………and you can guess the rest............

Let it be known now, for all who care, that duck eggs are not appropriate puppy play toys. They are fragile for one thing and break open fairly easily, seemingly always in the most inappropriate of places no less. They are fun though, in a messy way but I suppose that doesn’t matter when it only seems to launch Mommy’s stress-and-mess-meter right up into the stratosphere. 

So, take it from me, one who has been to the nesting box and survived to sniff another day. If it’s filled with goo, it’s not a toy.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Master Gamer</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/36797</link>

				<pubdate>Wed, 6 Apr 2005 14:41:00 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/36797</guid>
		<description>In Puppy-Land, shoes are toys. 

If a shoe is confiscated that just means it is a Good Toy and the ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ In Puppy-Land, shoes are toys. 

If a shoe is confiscated that just means it is a Good Toy and therefore must be re-acquired some way, some how at some point in your puppy life. 

All delicate shoes happen to be Good Toys. All slippers and anything remotely slipper-like are considered Good Toys. Anything that has an excessive cost associated with it is also a Good Toy. 

It should be noted here that your main objective with the Good Toys that have been foraged from the remote and hostile shoe closet wilderness is to win the  Shoe Game. 

This Shoe Game has enough rules and levels to rival any PS2 game. The definition of these rules, in fact the very game itself, is incomprehensible to shoe owners. Shoe owners are not even allowed to participate unless personally invited by the Bad Puppy….aka Master Gamer, Shoe Drooler, Chomper, and Hider Extraordinaire. 

A brief synopsis of the Shoe Game is as follows:  

In order to qualify for the main game Bad Puppy must untie 5 shoelaces over the course of a day. Multiple sporadic unties of the same shoes are acceptable and even encouraged. Bonus points will be awarded for the Bad Puppy who limits all shoelace untying endeavors to one house occupant, leaving the remaining house occupants to doubt the singled-out shoelace victim's claims of Bad Puppy deeds. This promotes doubt and can only win Bad Puppy favor in the long run. 

Remember………..Innocent until proven guilty applies to puppies too. 

Once Bad Puppy has moved on to the next level all shoes are fair game. The more expensive and delicate they are the higher the points that will be awarded. Bonus points go to the Bad Puppy who absconds with a high demand shoe. Points also awarded for length of time house occupant has to look for said shoe. 

Bonus rounds involve the removal of bits and pieces from a shoe. Only Master Gamers have access to this playing field as said gamer must frequently dodge flying objects and practice duck and cover maneuvers when the newly damaged game shoe is re-aquired by an outraged house occupant. 

So, have fun, look innocent, wag your tail and remember that house occupants aren’t allowed to play except by personal invitation even though their shoes are all fair game.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>You Know You Are a Dog Person When...</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/36580</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 5 Apr 2005 15:31:33 PDT</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/36580</guid>
		<description>You have a kiddie wading pool in the yard, but no small children. 

Scooby Snax are on your shoppi ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ You have a kiddie wading pool in the yard, but no small children. 

Scooby Snax are on your shopping list every week. 

You have baby gates permanently installed at strategic places around the house, but no babies. 

Puppy kisses are the sweetest thing ever to you while people around you cringe and make funny faces.

You can't see out the passenger side of the windshield because there are nose-prints all over the inside. 

You like people who like your dog. You despise people who don't. 

You talk about your dog the way other people talk about their kids. 

You put an extra blanket on the bed so your dog can be comfortable. 

You go to the pet supply store every Saturday because it's one of the very few places that lets you bring your dog inside, and your dog loves to go with you. 

You and the dog come down with something like flu on the same day.  Your dog sees the vet while you settle for an over-the-counter remedy from the drugstore. 

Your dog is getting old and arthritic, so you go buy lumber and build her a small staircase so she can climb onto the bed by herself. 

You match your furniture/carpet/clothes to your dog. 

You lecture people on responsible dog ownership every chance you get. 

You keep an extra water dish in your second-floor bedroom, in case your dog gets thirsty at night (after all, her other dish is way down on the first floor...) 

Your freezer contains more dog bones than anything else. 

You shovel a zigzag path in the back yard snow so your dog can reach all her favorite spots. 

You avoid vacuuming the house as long as possible because your dog is afraid of the vacuum cleaner. 

You keep eating even after finding a dog hair in your pasta. 

You make popcorn just to play catch with your dog. 

Your jewelry box contains no jewels ... just those fasteners from vari-kennels. 

Every time you read the name Bob, you think the guy's first name is Best of Breed. 

Your house isn't carpeted - the fuzzy furballs under your feet are soft enough ... 

Your hungry hubby comes home from work, lifts the cover of the pan on the stove and says, "Is this people food or dog food?" 

At your dinner parties, you always double check the butter before putting it on the table. 

You put important papers in the latest issue of your breed magazine ... you know you will find them there. 

You have dog hair stuck to the tape on wrapped gifts. 

You show up at the car dealers with a ruler, to measure and see if your big dog crate will fit. Before the actual purchase you make the dealer cringe by insisting that you load both crates and dog into the shiny, new vehicle to make sure it works! 

You remove all the seats from the van except the two in the front so you have room for crates... 

You cringe at the price of food in the grocery store but think nothing of the cost of dog food or treats. 

When you get the warning 'full' message on your digi-cam and you realize that there isn't a single picture of a two-legged person in it... 

~~~~~

(Author unknown)]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Mommy's Lil Helper</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/34673</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 28 Mar 2005 13:07:52 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/34673</guid>
		<description>My first Easter was fun! I got to help hide Easter eggs and then when no one was looking I re-positi ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ My first Easter was fun! I got to help hide Easter eggs and then when no one was looking I re-positioned them again and again. I followed everyone around while they tried to find them and I snagged a couple of baskets and ran around top speed when they chased after me. I just loved the attention!! 

Mommy calls me a ham but I don’t know what she means. I did get lots of turkey and bacon but no one gave me any ham that I know of. Certainly not enough to turn me into one anyway!

I like being Mommy's lil helper. Next year I'm going to try harder to wear the silly bunny ears  she got me and if I can figure out what this 'ham' business is all about maybe I will even sit still for a picture or two.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Teddy Bear</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/33066</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 21 Mar 2005 13:09:41 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/33066</guid>
		<description>My very first groomer ever, Paulette, is MIA so I had to go to a new groomer and they talked Mommy i ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ My very first groomer ever, Paulette, is MIA so I had to go to a new groomer and they talked Mommy into giving me something called a teddybear cut. 

Mommy loves teddy bears and that just sounded like something she was all on board for without even seeing any before/after mug shots which concerned me because it’s almost time for me to want a girlfriend and, teddybear cut or not, I need to look as cute as possible to help compensate for my extra tenacious behavioral tendencies.  

So there I was, in Mommy’s arms and I was kind of shaking to let her know that I didn’t really care for the facility, even though two of Mommy’s friends highly recommended the place. 

Mommy sensed my apprehension and almost backed out but they reassured her that I would be fine and they knew what they were doing, even if they didn’t give me kisses and extra pets and hugs like Paulette used to. 

I ended up having fun there. I made friends with Sammy the Schnauzer and a Poodle named Googers and got my extra dorky teddybear haircut. 

Mommy says I’m adorable and I look as cute as ever so it’s not that bad. I got to make new friends and I even earned a new nick name……..Joey Bear]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Lil Pumpkin</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/31510</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 14 Mar 2005 09:11:49 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/31510</guid>
		<description>I had to go to the Vet&acirc;s again Friday. 

Mommy was worried all week long about my bathroom activ ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I had to go to the Vet’s again Friday. 

Mommy was worried all week long about my bathroom activities, in particular, number 2’s. 

Just cause she didn’t see me go all week doesn’t mean I didn’t go!

Well, she didn’t see me go Sunday or Monday and by Tuesday worked herself into a tizzy about it and called my doctor.  My doctor said to give me canned pumpkin, which was really rather tasty and not at all what I expected (Mommy calls me Pumpkin now)

It probably would have worked too, except I wasn’t constipated in the first place. 

Anyway, then Mommy didn’t see me go Wednesday or Thursday so Friday I went back to the doctor’s and they all kissed me and hugged me and carried me all over the place and then poked and prodded me and they found out what I already knew, my system works just fine, thank you very much. 

Geeeeez, swallow one little Hot Wheels car hood once and some whole peanuts and now everyone overreacts about what might be blocking things up in there. 

Sheeeesh.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Yum Yum's</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/30161</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 8 Mar 2005 10:57:55 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/30161</guid>
		<description>Mommy threw a party on Saturday and I tried to be on my best behavior the whole time. 

It was a l ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Mommy threw a party on Saturday and I tried to be on my best behavior the whole time. 

It was a long party so that was kind of expecting an awful lot from me but I did a good job and Mommy was very proud of me. I hit it off with everyone there and I especially like Mommy’s brother Carl and Mommy’s friend Angie. 

Most people just patted me on the head and move on but Carl and Angie played with me and carried me around and that got other people to play with me and carry me around. 

So that’s how I discovered that I like to mingle. 

I also discovered that appetizer’s are delicious.

So delicious in fact that I think someone should have passed around trays with nothing but gourmet puppy appetizers on them. 

One of Mommy’s friends from work got me some homemade gourmet treats from a place called Bogy’s Barkery once and those were really good. 

Bogy’s Barkery didn’t show up at Mommy’s party though. 
 
I think for the next party I will just exercise my social skills and test taste Mommy’s appetizers. 

Maybe if she sees how good I am she will call Bogy’s for some more yum yum’s.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Gardens</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/28657</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 1 Mar 2005 10:11:28 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/28657</guid>
		<description>I love when Mommy gardens. It means winter is leaving and I get more outdoor fun time! 

Mommy kee ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I love when Mommy gardens. It means winter is leaving and I get more outdoor fun time! 

Mommy keeps the patio doors wide open, which is good just in case I need to quickly go hide in the house for a bit. You just never know when something you are chasing will turn around and start chasing you back.  It’s hard to be a puppy at times like that. 

I like to help out whenever I can and sometimes I will bring stuff to the piles Mommy makes when she digs and tugs and pulls and plants. Sometimes I take stuff out of the piles too if I come across things that don’t belong there. 

I use my finely honed sense of puppy awareness to help me determine what properly belongs in her piles. I don’t think she fully realizes the scope of my talents in these areas yet but I am patient with her. She will come around eventually.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Toys</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/27189</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 22 Feb 2005 08:57:55 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/27189</guid>
		<description>Any small item is a potential toy. If Mommy tries to confiscate it, this means that it is a Good Toy ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Any small item is a potential toy. If Mommy tries to confiscate it, this means that it is a Good Toy. I try to run and hide them under the bed but sometimes she catches me and I have to practice my suitably outraged look when Mommy takes the Good Toys away.

I always watch where she puts the ones she takes so I can steal them back later. Two reliable sources of toys are dresser tops and wastebaskets. 

There are several types of puppy toys. Bright shiny things like keys, earrings, or coins should be hidden so that the cats can't play with them. Those types of toys are also generally good for playing hockey with on the kitchen floor.

Dangly things such as shoelaces, cords, gold chains, and dental floss also make excellent toys. 

So do paper towels. This game only lasts as long as the size of the roll on the holder and it requires a cat to get things started but just so you know, Mommy doesn't like to play the paper towel game.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Puppy Review</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/26273</link>

				<pubdate>Thu, 17 Feb 2005 15:03:29 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/26273</guid>
		<description>Age 2 months: Looks at himself and sees the world as one big fun playground full of things to chew a ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Age 2 months: Looks at himself and sees the world as one big fun playground full of things to chew and tug and pull 
 
Age 3 months: Looks at himself and sees a wild wolf in the making, all things made of chicken will only help his wolf development 
 
Age 4 months: Looks at himself and sees the Commander and Chief of the back yard, Ruler of all who inhabit it, even if they are older and bigger and not into play as much as he is
 
Age 5 months: Looks at himself and sees a raging ball of puppy power
 
Age 6 months: Looks at himself and sees that Vets and shots and surgeries are evil outdated concepts that he shouldn’t have been subjected to
 
Age 7 months: Looks at himself and sees a dorky Santa hat and foofie Christmas sweater and wonders if it would help his Mommy to not put him in those types of ridiculous predicaments if he were less cute
 
Age 8 months: Looks at himself and sees that there is an edge he should never go past when dealing with sharp claws and upset cats
 
Age 9 months: Looks at himself and reminds himself that unlike kitties he doesn’t have 9 lives and shouldn’t jump from high places, even though he managed to climb up there himself in the first place.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Wags</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/25994</link>

				<pubdate>Wed, 16 Feb 2005 11:27:28 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/25994</guid>
		<description>Mommy and me watched the Best in Show portion of The Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show. We also caugh ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Mommy and me watched the Best in Show portion of The Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show. We also caught some of the Toy Group portion and a Pekingese won that part! Yay me. My doggie mom was Pekingese. The Pekingese, named Jeffrey, was sooooooooooo furry. I must take more after my doggie dad in that area because my coat is more medium long and wavy. 

The show finalists were:

Ch Borderfame Spellbound
Border Collie - Merlin (looked really smart, he probably goes to school)

Ch Dieudonne Impyrial Acclaim
Great Pyrenees – Fame (looked like a walking snowman)

Ch Cracknor Cause Celebre
Norfolk Terrier – Coco (Mommy’s favorite)

Ch Yakee If Only
Pekingese – Jeffrey (looked like a Star Trek Tribble)

Ch Kimik's Bare Necessities
Tibetan Terrier – Baloo ( looked like an Oreo cookie)

Ch Kan-Point's VJK Autumn Roses
Pointer (German Shorthaired) – Carlee (Winnnnnner, she pointed at me a lot through the TV)

Ch Heathers Knock On Wood
Bloodhound – Knotty (looked happy to be there, didn’t show off his AKC win)

The Best in Show winner was awesome. Her name is Carlee and she is a five year old German shorthaired pointer. 

It seemed to me like she walked on air with her gliding gait. All seven of the finalists were great though. My Mommy’s favorite was Coco, the Norfolk Terrier and I kept watching the bloodhound named Knotty who won the AKC/Eukanuba show that me and Mommy watched. 

I think Carlee won because she hammed it up for the crowd during her “free stack’ time.  She brought her A game to the show, that’s for sure! She sure can point!!

Mommy and me were both happy that she won, even though we had other favorites. 

I wonder how they control all the dogs so they don’t want to run amuk and play all the time and why all that green carpet is fresh and clean. It kind of looks like grass. 

Anyway……..Yay Carlee, tail wags for you!]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Hug-A-Pup</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/25630</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 14 Feb 2005 11:00:39 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/25630</guid>
		<description>My Valentine&acirc;s day is awesome so far!

Mommy put the &acirc;wow&acirc; in bow wow wow and gave me 3 new  ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ My Valentine’s day is awesome so far!

Mommy put the ‘wow’ in bow wow wow and gave me 3 new toys!!! I feel so doggone lucky that I gave her extra Puppy Kisses.

Mommy told me that Puppy Kisses have the power to make her feel happy. Just one Puppy Kiss can make any trouble disappear... and it always brings out the big smiles. 

She said that Puppy Kisses cure the blues and will last and last, even if it's rainy outside.........a wagging tail can always make anyone’s day better. 

I know the reason why. I figured it out. 

It’s because puppies trust and love unconditionally. Mommy said that any puppy's love should never be taken for granted. 

Everyone should nurture their puppies and they will have the very best and the very sweetest furryfriend for life. 

Happy Valentine’s Day!]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>MVP</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/24352</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 7 Feb 2005 10:28:24 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/24352</guid>
		<description>I liked watching some of the Animal Planets PuppyBowl this past weekend with Mommy. 

Although no  ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I liked watching some of the Animal Planets PuppyBowl this past weekend with Mommy. 

Although no one was wearing a uniform, name or number tags, and there didnt appear to be any rhyme or reason to formation, huddles, play execution or coaching, it was fun to see the bigger puppies pick on each other while the little puppies tried to join in. 

I wish I was invited to participate in this. Mommy said I could do an end-around sweep like no ones business and my natural TENACITY would have guaranteed a victory. 

My favorite puppy player was Bandit, the 13 week old Jack Russell Terrier. He was so small compared to most of the other puppies but he sure didnt give up!

My next favorite was Hooter, a 16 week old Sheppard/Husky mix. 

I hope they put me on the roster for a Pro-Puppy Bowl, if they have one. 

Im going to work out extra hard this week just in case. 

I will increase my pounces and my tooshie-wiggles and I better double up on my kitty taunting/chasing exercises. 

I want to get the Most Valuable Puppy award!]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Pizza</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/23560</link>

				<pubdate>Thu, 3 Feb 2005 11:16:16 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/23560</guid>
		<description>The pizza guy smells like someone I need to get to know better. Whenever he comes to our house Mommy ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ The pizza guy smells like someone I need to get to know better. Whenever he comes to our house Mommy tries to keep me from jumping up on him but she doesnt understand that all of my future well-being and happiness rests on being able to do that. 

While Im at it I should also mention that its unfair not to give me my own pizza (or at the very least some of Mommys) but I have a plan to use my cute-ness and some patience and sooner or later she will cave in. 

Last night while everyone was watching a creepy movie I got a hold of a stray slice of olive from someone's pizza. I dont know who dropped it or what purpose it serves but it was fun to play with. 

Mommy said that I must really love olives because I looked like a cat does with catnip when I was rolling all over my olive slice and stretching and pouncing on it. 

I just figured that if it looks like a bug it should play like a bug too.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Ruff Stuff</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/22013</link>

				<pubdate>Wed, 26 Jan 2005 13:15:55 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/22013</guid>
		<description>I knew it was just a matter of time before one of Mommys (3) cats got around to taking an effectivel ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I knew it was just a matter of time before one of Mommys (3) cats got around to taking an effectively aimed and accurately delivered swipe at me. 

I would like to be able to say I didnt have it coming. I would like to but I cant simply because when I get it in my mind to play with those kitties I wont be deterred until I have worked one of them up to the point where they chase after me, seemingly intent solely on doing me bodily harm. 

This, of course, affords me the opportunity to demostrate my developing skills in the evasive mad-dasher dare-devil flippy-sofa manuvering category.

I cant help it, I love to be chased. I warm up to it by sprinting around them in an ever decreasing circular pattern, occasionally darting in and nudging them with the tip of my nose and darting away at top speed, ears flapping and paws pumping. 

Mommy loves my enthusiasm but I think  she could personally do without the conflict that inevitably follows. 

As it stands now, Mommy has narrowed the list of suspects down to two possible culprits, Hamilton (big mean orange cat who wants nothing to do with anything even remotely puppy-like) or Tommy (Turtle colored lap kitty who occasional plays with, and tolerates me, but only up to a certain point)

Well, I had a scuffle with one of them and then I had to visit the doctor. It turns out that I sustained a wicked eye injury and my doctor put green dye in there and turned on a black light. Mommy could see the bright neon scratch mark left on my cornea and when she asked if they could ascertain any type of pawprints for easier culprit identity she  was informed that this option wasnt available, despite our obviously valid consumer need. 

So after lots of worry and concern on Mommys part, after missing work to take me to the Vets to get my eye fixed, after paying what should have been unnecessary Vet bill......all she had to say to me was, Dont poke the kitty, Joey, or you will wake up the tiger!

Did I at least learn a valuable, albeit painful, lesson?  Im afraid not since last night I was back up to speed, taunting the meowsers again. 

.......-.__.-.
......l /)"(| /
ruff (_o_) ruff
.......................]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Spaw Treatments</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/21587</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 24 Jan 2005 13:53:09 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/21587</guid>
		<description>I did something new on Friday that kind of scared me. It made me shake and tremble until Mommy told  ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ I did something new on Friday that kind of scared me. It made me shake and tremble until Mommy told me it was a lil adventure and kissed me 20 times. 

I got to go to my first official Spaw day! My groomers name is Paulette and she smells like puppies and loves to give kisses and hugs. 

Mommy usually gives me my baths once a week (or more if I have been really active in dirty puppy sports in the backyard) and then every night before bed we brush my coat and wash my ears and eyes and we brush my teeth but this time mommy let Paulette do it because I needed other stuff done........... like a puppy tune up. I got washed and brushed and fluffed and trimmed and cleaned and pampered and I had a lot of fun!

After Mommy picked me up she took me back to her office for the rest of the day and everyone there said I was so cute with my new haircut. 

I think those Spaw treatments are okay after all. I like all of the attention and besides now I learned something new........Fluffy puppies pounce higher. 

ruff ruff]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Best of Show</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/20106</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 17 Jan 2005 14:35:34 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/20106</guid>
		<description>Mommy and me watched some of the Animal Planets 2-day coverage of the 2005 AKC/Eukanuba National Cha ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Mommy and me watched some of the Animal Planets 2-day coverage of the 2005 AKC/Eukanuba National Championship. Mommy says it is easy to get into the show, especially if you are fond of the furrys, which we are.

I think I have what it takes to be a top show dog, except age and breeding and papers and manners, oh, and patience. If they create a loopy, fun, happy-go-lucky puppy category my mommy says I would take that by a landslide.  

The ultimate winner, Best in Show (also Best in Breed) was Knotty, CH HEATHERS KNOCK ON WOOD Bloodhound, who was definitely a crowd favorite. He looked pretty big. I wouldnt want to follow him on the floor mat. 

There were some others that I liked. 

Best Breed-  Rottweiler 
CH KEEROCKA'S ENTERTAINER CD TD 
Call Name Elvis (but I renamed him, Make Me, he looked like he would win any tug-of-war game) 

Working Group Winner - Giant Schnauzer 
CH LOWDOWN JACQUI FRAZIER-LYDE 
Call Name Jacqui (I think she was flirting with me because she kept staring at me through the TV, when I am ready for a girlfriend I will tell mommy to call her)

Sporting Group Best of Breed Spaniels (Sussex) 
CH CLUSSEXX THREE D GRINCHY GLEE 
Call Name Stump (His name really fits him, mommy liked this one)

Toy Group  Best of Variety Poodles (Toy) 
CH NORTH WELL CHAKO JP PLATINA KING 
Call Name Coleman (Probably better named Cotton Ball, I think this poodles mommy would have a conniption fit if he ever chased ducks thru the mud with me)

There were some very interesting other entries. One in particular looked like a giant mop, and if I paid more attention to his detail and less attention to his dreadlocks I would be able to name his breed, but as it stands all I can offer by way of acknowledgment now is the name mommy gave him.....which was, Swiffer

I watched some of the dogs for pointers on how to act just in case they ever call me to be a contestant.  I think I could prance and preen and stand pretty for up to 5 seconds but it would be hard not to lick anyone who tried to open my mouth to peek inside. 

Also, Im not sure how to control my pounce yet and I didnt see a lot of dogs doing that but maybe its not a bad thing, maybe it would get me extra pawpoints. 

I guess it doesnt matter though. Mommy gave me some blue toys and said I took Best of House, Best of Back Yard and Best Puppy awards already.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>grrrrrrrrrrrrr</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/19356</link>

				<pubdate>Thu, 13 Jan 2005 13:43:09 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/19356</guid>
		<description>We have three kitties living in my house. They take up some of mommys time which I dont like and one ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ We have three kitties living in my house. They take up some of mommys time which I dont like and one of them is possessed.  Two of them are okay but the big hungry orange one is mean. Im not gonna name names but he knows Im on to him. 

The white kitty is my favorite because he lets me pounce on him. If I could say giddy up I would make him piggy-back ride me around the living room but so far all he does is lay flat on the floor when I catch him. I think he is pretending to be a lumpy rug but it doesnt fool me. 

My second favorite is the turtle colored one. He plays chase with me! Well, I have to poke him a couple of times and flick his ears and give him a nudge to get him started but once he is warmed up, oh boy!, does he run fast!!
I have to do some daredevil flippy sofa maneuvers to get away from him sometimes. 

I always win those games because mommy says I am TENACIOUS. Im not sure exactly what it means but I think all tenacious puppies must be super athletes or trained for special secret missions somewhere. 

Maybe I could be trained how to win the grrrrrrrrrring matches with the orange one. He doesnt scare me though. Hes not the boss of me but those claws look creepy and he sounds like he doesnt ever want anything to do with puppy piggy back rides in the living room.

bad bad kitty]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Berserker Bonsai Puppy</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/18742</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 10 Jan 2005 08:57:16 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/18742</guid>
		<description>If it looks like a toy and acts like a toy it should technically be fair game for chewing. I am havi ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ If it looks like a toy and acts like a toy it should technically be fair game for chewing. I am having a hard time convincing mommy of this. There are times when I try to hold back and think through the highly tempting situations that I find myself in regarding proper playthings. Then again, there are times when Berserker Bonsai Puppy has to pounce and no amount of mommy supervision can prevent it. 

It's like a force of nature, all that explosive energy. I can't help it, I have to express myself. 

If mommy doesn't want me to attack the buttons on her sweater then they shouldn't be shiny and bite-sized.. 

If Im not supposed to tug on her hair then she shouldnt use toy-colored scrunchis

If Im not supposed to pounce on mommy in bed at 4am then someone should have taught me to read a clock..

If Im not supposed to chase the ducks around the back yard then why do I have duck shaped toys to practice on]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Angel Paws</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/18123</link>

				<pubdate>Thu, 6 Jan 2005 13:48:11 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/18123</guid>
		<description>My mom has taken down all the twinkling decorations and her collectables, which I like to refer to a ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ My mom has taken down all the twinkling decorations and her collectables, which I like to refer to as.......puppy toys that I couldnt quite reach.......and you almost cant tell it was Christmas, except for some tinsel and one ornament that I stashed under the sofa. 

Out of the three table top trees that mom set up I only got to tip one over but it created some crashy glass breaking noise and made mom rush over to inspect my paws for cuts. I put on my very best, I didnt do it on purpose look and she kissed the top of my head and cleaned up the mess.  

All in all, I was an angel puppy for my first Christmas. Well, I did commandeer some stuffed bears and a stuffed penguin and a big red Santa and I ate some decorations and broke a couple of things but even my coup de grace on that one tree didnt turn out so bad. 

I think that mom will put up the regular big tree next year. I can handle it. My halo is a bit crooked and a little bent but by next Christmas it will be all shiny and perfect again.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>DOG PHRASE  =  MEANING</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/17930</link>

				<pubdate>Wed, 5 Jan 2005 13:21:42 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/17930</guid>
		<description>Ruff  = Feed me

ruff ruff = Pet me

rrrrrrrrruf = I Love You

roooooooooo-oo = I am in love a ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Ruff  = Feed me

ruff ruff = Pet me

rrrrrrrrruf = I Love You

roooooooooo-oo = I am in love and must meet my betrothed outside beneath the hedge. Don't wait up

rowwwwrow = I feel like making noise

rrrow-awww = Why keep rubbing my nose in it? I already KNOW whose it is

rrrow-rwoww = Just because I have a three-second attention span, don't think I'll mind eating the same crunchy chunks every timeâ€¦.........Oh boy! Crunchy Chunks!

grrrrrrrrr-row = Play with me.
       
mmmfrerg = Have you noticed the shortage of available toys in this room?

barwowow = Since I can't find anything better to play with, I shall see what happens when I chase my tail.

grrrruffff = I think I will now spend time licking the most private parts of my anatomy.

GRRRRRRrufff  = I am now recalling, with sorrow, that some of my private parts did not return with me from that visit to the vet.

barkbarkbark = I am so glad to see that you have returned home with both arms full of groceries.  I will now jump on you in wild abandoned glee and rub myself against your legs and attempt to trip you as you walk towards the kitchen.

gakk-ak-ak = My digestive passages seem to have formed a gelatinous muck. 
Wherever could this have come from? I shall leave it here on the carpeting.

rrrr = Snuggling is a good idea.

arrrrg = Shedding is pretty good, too.

ummfff = I was enjoying snuggling and shedding in the warm clean laundry until you removed me so unkindly.

rrrrRRRRg = Oh, small creature! Please come closer

mmmruff = It is certain that the best tasting scooby snax are the ones you have stolen or forged for yourself. 

mmmmmmm = If I lay in the sunshine for another hour or so, I think I shall be satisfied.
 
barwowow = Why do you keep putting the lid down on the big water bowl?

GGGrRR =  The wimpy postal worker never comes in the house to fight me for dominion over the neighborhood. So I must continue patrolling, for I am Lord and Master!]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/12935</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 7 Dec 2004 10:47:33 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/12935</guid>
		<description>AUSTRALIAN SHEPHERD :  First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little
circle...

BEAGLE :  ZZZZZ ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ AUSTRALIAN SHEPHERD :  First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little
circle...

BEAGLE :  ZZZZZZzzzzz.z.z.z..z..z..z...z

BORDER COLLIE :  Just one.  And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up
to code.

BOXER :  Who cares?  I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark......

COCKER SPANIEL :  Why change it?  I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.

CORGI :  You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!

DOBERMAN :  While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch.

GERMAN SHEPHERD :  I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the
dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more
perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the
situation.

GOLDEN RETRIEVER :  The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got your
whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned
out bulb?

GREYHOUND :  It isn't moving.  Who cares?

IRISH WOLFHOUND : Can somebody else do it?  I've got this hangover.....

JACK RUSSELL TERRIER :  I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls
and furniture.

LAB : Oh, me, me!!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I?
Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I?

OLD ENGLISH SHEEP DOG :  Light bulb?  I'm sorry, but I don't see a light
bulb?

POINTER :  I see it, there it is, there it is, right there...

POODLE :  I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it.  By the
time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

ROTTWEILER : Make me.

TIBETAN TERRIER :  Let the Border Collie do it.  You can feed me while he's
busy!

MALTESE:  Ooh, light not working. Eh. Whatever. Me cuddle now. (Thanks, Bean Sprout!)

PUG: I can't eat it so who cares? (Thanks, Olaf J. Pugg!) 

CATS : Dogs do not change light bulbs.  People change light bulbs.  So, the
question is: How long will it be before I can expect light?

~Author Unknown]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Puppy Holiday Destruction/DOA Count</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/12747</link>

				<pubdate>Mon, 6 Dec 2004 11:25:18 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/12747</guid>
		<description>1 Keepsake ornament &Atilde;&cent;&acirc;&not;&acirc; Toast

1 Holiday cheese decoration - Mangled 

1 Ceramic holiday mo ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ 1 Keepsake ornament â€“ Toast

1 Holiday cheese decoration - Mangled 

1 Ceramic holiday mouse (now minus the cheese decoration) â€“ Currently on hit list, have been foiled twice already by overly-observant mom.

3 Gold wrapped styrofoam packages for tree manger decoration â€“ Shredded and partially consumed â€“ Note to self: in light of the worried look this one generated in mom, may want to avoid rest of manger scene altogether

2 Colorful packages with bows and ribbons â€“ Unwrapped in true berserker puppy fashion, took liberty of dispersing bits and pieces all over house in festive attempt to spread the joy

Still to come: Santa sled and reindeer decoration - Scheduled for demolition this week. 

Tis the season

:)]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Game On</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/12274</link>

				<pubdate>Fri, 3 Dec 2004 09:04:10 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/12274</guid>
		<description>Just so you know, I want to play all the time. Every time my mom gets home, anytime anyone is sleepi ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Just so you know, I want to play all the time. Every time my mom gets home, anytime anyone is sleeping, whenever anyone is around, itâ€™s pretty much game time. 

Usually when I want to play I wear down whoever is playing with me first and I get to keep my puppy crown but last night was different. 

Someone who is kind of my size came over and she is a real sweetie. 

At first my mom was concerned that Iâ€™d get hurt or that Sweetie would be hurt but then she saw that we just wanted to play so she stopped worrying. 

Well, Sweetie wore me out. Thatâ€™s never happened before! I never played so much in all my 7 months of life so far! I just know I woke up some new muscles and I did have to hand over my puppy crown to Sweetie but Iâ€™m gonna get it back tonight when mom gets home. 

I can always outlast mom.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Santa Paws</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/11813</link>

				<pubdate>Tue, 30 Nov 2004 13:23:37 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/11813</guid>
		<description>The Christmas spirit has nestled in deep at my house and mom calls me her little bundle of bounce, S ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ The Christmas spirit has nestled in deep at my house and mom calls me her little bundle of bounce, Santa Paws. 

I made it necessary to reevaluate the general dispersal of decoration around the house in a purely preventative effort, on mom's part,  to stave off the destruction of her holiday collectables and protect my not so hardy digestive system. 

Everything seems to be going well, so far, but she didnt put up the full size tree this year. It would have been a great chew toy and I think pine needles and tinsel would pass through a puppy pretty easy but she decided to play it safe and put up three different table top trees instead

 I hope I can talk a cat into batting down something for me to play with. 

With the candles burning and the fireplace going and the lights twinkling from all over, it looks pretty festive. Peaceful too, until I figure out  how to pull on the light cords and tip the tabletop trees over. 

For the record, I dont think mom has a contingency plan in place for this occurrence although I feel certain itâ€™s going to happen soon. 

The Christmas trees are toast, its just a matter of time before those dangling power cords are too tempting for me to resist.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

	<item>
		<title>Howdeee</title>
		<link>http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/11222</link>

				<pubdate>Fri, 26 Nov 2004 13:09:11 PST</pubdate>
		<author>Joey ~ writing at dogster.com</author>
		<category></category>		
		<guid ispermalink="true">http://www.dogster.com/dogs/90771/diary/Puppipawz/11222</guid>
		<description>Hi, my name is Joey. Im a Taurus and I like chewing shoes and anything else that looks remotely like ...</description>

		<content:encoded><![CDATA[ Hi, my name is Joey. Im a Taurus and I like chewing shoes and anything else that looks remotely like a bunny. Im 6 months old and I just got back from the doctors where they did unspeakable things to the lower area of what was once part of my body.

I am recovering nicely and since they also gave me a pretty new red tag to go with some shots they snuck in when I was knocked out, I got some extra added jingle to my collar. 

My mom says only good dogs get extra jingle on their collars. So now I have my name tag, my rabies tag and my little bell. The bell warns the kitties and ducks when Im stalking them but my built in puppy pounce goes a long way to helping me overcome that handicap. 

I recently learned how to jump into baskets of clean warm fuzzy towels after Ive been chasing the ducks through the mud and this helps mom keep me clean and soft. 

When she gets that look on her face after Ive helped her a little too much I just wag my tail and she kisses the top of my head.]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	

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